THE VOICE OF FIRE
Volume 1, Number 1. Summer Solstice An CIX ☉ in 0° Cancer, ☽ in 29° Scorpio.
Friday 21st June 2013 e.v.
'Draw into naught
All life, death, hatred, love:
All self concentred in the sole desire -
Hear thou the Voice of Fire!'
Tannhauser. Aleister Crowley.
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.
Love is the law, love under will.
Volume 1, Number 1 of the Voice of Fire is dedicated to Norman Mudd, Frater Omnia Pro Veritate [1889-1934]
CONTENTS
Editorial
Norman Mudd: a biographical sketch
Ab Uno Disce Omnes
Why become a Thelemite?
Capricornus
Liber Resh vel Helios
The Moon Haunt of Silence
Perdurabo
The Mass of the Phoenix
Lines upon a portrait of Mister Edward Alexander Crowley
Liber CL De Lege Libellum
Crowley in Cambridge
Isis Blossom
Notes upon a ceremonial invocation of Παν
The Wand of Silence
The Magic Book Worm
Pegamina part one
EDITORIAL
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.
We have seen in recent times a rise in interest in Thelema and all things 'Crowley' and the Great Beast has never been so popular! There have been some excellent biographies, such as 'Do what thou wilt: a life of Aleister Crowley' by Lawrence Sutin [2000 e.v.], 'A Magick Life: the biography of Aleister Crowley' by Martin Booth [2000 e.v.]; 'Aleister Crowley the biography: spiritual revolutionary, romantic explorer, occult master - and spy' by Tobias Churton [2011 e.v.] and the excellent 'Perdurabo: the life of Aleister Crowley' by Richard Kaczynski [2002 e.v.]. But despite this renaissance in matters magical, the Law of Thelema casts but a little shadow on the sunless shores of old England. Here, among the damp valleys there still lurks an element of suspicion as the hostile mind still wades through the bogs of the old aeon and clings to fear and prejudices because it knows no other way. As Thelemites we must ask ourselves this question: what is my will? to which we must answer: it is my will to pursue spiritual advancement by the means set forth in Liber AL vel Legis; to which shall appear the reply: To what end? and thou shalt answer as a devoted aspirant: to seek by attainment the Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel. Yet still the reply comes: to what end? to which you must ultimately answer: that I may accomplish the Great Work. Love is the Law, love under will. A time has now come for uniting and people of all nations and all walks of life are coming to Thelema. These true seekers of the Light are taking their first steps upon the path of the Great Work and with those steps may the current flourish and grow. Through all this, there is a connection, even when it seems that we are in darkness, fighting the battle alone. It is the work of each of us to define the Law of Thelema for ourselves, as individuals and to let its Light shine with purpose throughout all the ordeals and the joys of Life!
Love is the law, love under will.
The Voice of Fire welcomes submissions (poetry, short stories, articles and reviews etc). Please send all submissions to the editor at barryvanasten418@hotmail.com
We are also considering a ‘contacts page’ should there be a need for such. This of course would be a box number to reply to and we shall forward any replies free of charge. Please send your details, listing interests and needs etc, of any length to the editor at the above email address.
Norman Mudd
a biographical sketch
Norman attended Ducie Avenue Schools in Manchester and earned a Mathematic Scholarship to Cambridge. He entered Trinity College in July 1907 and remained until 1910. I contacted the Archive Department at Trinity College, Cambridge and according to their admissions records Norman Mudd was ‘born in Manchester on 16 Jan 1888. He attended Manchester Grammar School before being admitted to Trinity on Tuesday 25th June 1907, to which date he had an Entrance Scholarship later backdated. He was elected to a Senior Scholarship in 1910, the year he graduated with a BA having taken a first class in the mathematical tripos. Mudd was awarded the college Maths prize in both 1908 and 1910.’ Strange how the admissions records has his year of birth as 1888 when the Registration of Births in England for the first quarter (March) of 1889 distinctly says ‘Mudd, Norman. Prestwich, Lancashire, 8d: 403. At University, he was a member of the Pan Society (as was his friend Victor Neuburg) [Crowley read a few papers for the Pan Society on mystical subjects] and secretary of the Cambridge University Freethought Association, which also included Neuburg among its ranks. Unfortunately Mudd had to resign his position in the Freethought Society due to his association with Aleister Crowley, whom he had met in December 1907, and because he was distributing Crowley’s literature. When the Dean of Trinity College, a crazed and despicable creature by the name of Rev. Reginald St. John Parry (1858-1935) heard that Crowley was giving talks at the Freethought Association meetings and that Mudd was an acquaintance, Mudd became the scapegoat for the Dean, who made accusations against Crowley concerning his sexual conduct' with male undergraduates. Mudd, coming from a poor background with little influence and relying on the scholarship for his education, had no choice but to resign and swear that he would not see or speak to Crowley again. This of course, he secretly broke. Yet, for a long time he felt that he had betrayed Crowley in his actions. He received his M.A. and an offer of two jobs, one at the National Physical Laboratory and the other as a Professor at Grey University College, Bloemfontein, South Africa. Seeking adventure, Norman naturally chose the latter. Three months before Mudd arrived in South Africa, he is listed on the English census for 1911, taken on Sunday 2nd April as a ‘Student Cambridge’ and he is 22 years old and living with his parents and sisters at 37 Middleton Street, Moss Side, South Manchester, a private dwelling with five rooms. His father, William is now a Head Master aged 49 and his mother Emma is 51. Nellie Mudd is 23 and works as a ‘Baker and confectionary shop keeper’ while Eva is 17 and works as a ‘staff clerk’.
Mudd arrived in South Africa in July 1911 and he ran the Department of Applied Mathematics from 1911-1912.
Mudd was the author of several mathematical papers including: ‘The Gravitational Potential and Energy of Harmonic Deformations of any Order’ (possibly written around 1911) and a criticism of Einstein’s theory of relativity: ‘the Generalised Theory of Relativity’ (possibly written in 1925). In 1915 Norman lost an eye due to a gonorrhoeal infection. From 1916-1917 he ran the Department of Pure Mathematics. However, Norman was prone to depression and bouts of low self-esteem. He decided to take a year’s sabbatical vacation in 1920 – Norman had been searching for something which he never found, something he only felt during his time with Crowley at Cambridge where the two talked of science and poetry, philosophy and psychology. It was the only time Mudd felt alive! And so he sailed from South Africa on board the Balmoral Castle and arrived in Southampton on Monday 13th December 1920. He searched like a devoted pupil for his master but could find him nowhere! Believing Crowley must be still in the United States he boarded the Imperator and arrived in America on Tuesday 18th January 1921. He went to Detroit and was downhearted to find Crowley had already left for England; but he did find Jones (Frater Achad) and Walter T. Smith there. Jones initiated Mudd as a Neophyte of the A∴A∴ and Mudd took the magical name of Frater Omnia Pro Veritate (All for Truth). Following his stay with the Detroit Thelemites, Mudd returned to England on board the Carmania and arrived on Monday 7th February 1921.
In a letter to his friend Leo Marquard dated 10-12 February 1921, he writes in romantic mood ‘The taking up of this Path is what is referred to variously as the Second Birth, or being Born of the Water of the Spirit, or (by Dante) the Vita Nuova, or (by the Egyptians) the Entrance on Light, or (by the Buddhists) the Noble Aryan Path, or (by the Alchemists) the great Work, and so on.'
Hearing that Crowley was in Cefalu at his Abbey of Thelema, Norman undertook the journey there and arrived at the Abbey on Sunday 22nd April 1923. The next day Mudd attends a meeting with Crowley and Leah Hirsig at the Office of the Commissario and Crowley is expelled from Italy and given one week to settle his affairs (Mudd and Hirsig are allowed to stay on). Mudd became Crowley’s secretary (he had already turned down a job offer to organise a School of Astronomy at the University of South Africa. After the expulsion, Crowley left Cefalu on Tuesday 1st May and travelled to Tunis arriving on Friday 11th May and Mudd joined him there on Wednesday 20th June 1923. The devoted Frater Omnia Pro Veritate took dictation and copied Crowley's manuscripts and all the time he was determined to clear Crowley's name after all the bad publicity from the British Press. Mudd really believed that The Book of the Law held the key to unlocking a new epoch in mathematical application.
Mudd returned to England to continue the Great Work on Friday 6th June 1924 and lived at a flat in Chelsea, London. Soror Estai (Jane Wolfe, 1875-1958) joined him there and worked as his secretary in copying Mudd’s letters and Crowley’s ‘An Open Letter to Lord Beaverbrook’ for distribution. They were very poor and had to sell items of clothing and manuscripts for food and rent. The two became lovers, although they were not in love with each other, Mudd still had deep feelings for Leah. Jane Wolfe found it difficult living with Mudd saying that he was a ‘fussy’ man ‘set in his ways’, stubborn, intelligent yet ‘lacking in social position’ and very excitable! On Thursday 24th July 1924, Mudd had to take a rest from the Great Work as his nerves were suffering. He joined Leah in Paris on Tuesday 30th September 1924 and on Friday 3rd October Leah placed the ‘Seal of Babalon’ upon Mudd’s phallus. By Sunday (5th October) they were married in an informal Thelemic ceremony, which was consummated two days later on Tuesday 7th October. By Wednesday 19th November, Mudd was back in England, poor and homeless!
By 1925 Mudd was beginning to have doubts in Crowley, believing the Great Beast was misinterpreting the Law of Thelema as given in The Book of the Law thus failing in the eyes of the Secret Chiefs. Poor Mudd, suffering great poverty was duly banished from the A∴A∴ by Crowley, no doubt also because Mudd had fallen in love with Alostrael, Crowley’s Scarlet Woman, Leah Hirsig. Mudd returned to his father on the Isle of Man on Wednesday 24th February 1926. He formally withdrew his name from the broadsheet ‘Ein Zeugnis der Suchenden’ [The Testament of a Seeker] which was signed by Crowley, Mudd and Heinrich Tranker (1880-1956) at the Conference of Grand Masters, held at Weida, Thuringia in Germany in 1925. By 1927 Mudd had lost all interest in magick.
On Saturday 6th September 1930 he sent a letter (written in his own hand) on behalf of Leah Hirsig and himself, from Spain, renouncing their magical oaths.
On Sunday 6th May 1934, aged 45, Norman Mudd of 220 Arlington Road, London, NW1, took a room at the Manor Hotel, Forest, Guernsey. He must have been suffering terrible depression and feeling the loss of Crowley and Thelema in his life which prompted him to take the awful steps he did. At a loss and determined to end it all, he put his bicycle clips on and filled his trousers with stones and walked into the English Channel. The Hotel Proprietor reported Mudd missing to the Police on Saturday 16th June, saying that he was last seen at 7p.m. on Friday 15th June. The Police recovered his body on Saturday 16th June at Portlet bay at midday. The inquest was held on Monday 18th June and the verdict was ‘suicide’. Norman Mudd, Frater Omnia Pro Veritate, Neophyte of the A∴A∴ was buried in plot number 8, grave number 1 in New Cemetery, Forest, Guernsey on Wednesday 20th June 1934. Perhaps it is pure coincidence that the date of his birth, 16 when added to the date of his Greater Feast, 15 gives us 31!
To whom it may concern.
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.
I am an MA of Cambridge University (Mathematical Scholar of Trinity College). I have known Aleister Crowley for over thirteen years. He is admittedly one of the most remarkable poets and writers of the present day.
I have studied his scientific memoranda with great care, and I am satisfied that they would lead to discoveries which will furnish mankind with a new instrument of knowledge and a new method of research.
I have examined the accusations made against him by certain newspapers of a certain class, and find them without exception baseless falsehoods. I know that his ideals are noble, his honour stainless, and his life devoted wholly to the service of mankind. Having given his entire fortune to his work, he has been unable to refute publicly the calumnies of his assailants. He has found no men among those who know him, sufficiently prominent, powerful, and courageous to come forward and vindicate him before the world.
The honour of England is concerned that her greatest poet should not perish under the malice or neglect of his fellow-countrymen, as so often in history.
I shall come to London and devote myself to persuading some person or corporation of authority, wealth, or influence, to investigate the accusations against Mr Crowley...
Love is the law, love under will.
Norman Mudd
[Vindication letter published in the Isis magazine. Oxford. 14th November 1923. Also see Crowley’s Tunisian Diaries for 1923: ‘The Magical Diaries of Aleister Crowley’. Edited by Stephen Skinner. 1996. p.154-155 and p.212-214. ]
Notes:
1. William Dale Mudd was christened on 11th August 1861 at Manchester Cathedral. His parents were George and Mary Mudd. In the 1871 census George Mudd is 50 and born in Ripon, Yorkshire, he works as a 'hair cutter'; Mary is 43 from Pilsley, Derbyshire and their children are: James H Mudd, 19; William Dale Mudd, 9; Alfred Mudd, 5 and Charles Mudd, 16 and a 'sterotyper', all born in Manchester. In 1881 William Dale Mudd is a student living at Chester St Oswald, Cheshire.
2. Eva Mudd married Willaim Poole Robinson (son of James Robinson, a 'foreman') on 13th April 1922. Eva, a clerk is 28 and living at 87 Princess Road, Moss Side while William (born in Ulverston, Lancashire in 1897) is a salesman, 26 living at 138 Broadfield Road, Moss Side, Manchester. William Dale Mudd attends the wedding and he is described as a 'Schoolmaster Retired'.
Barry Van-Asten
Ab Uno Disce Omnes
In taking up the Royal robe of Light:
Hail to thee - brave Thelemite!
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law:
Thou art a beauteous star, adore
Thine earthly temple; invigorate
All substance, sacred; contemplate
Thine pleasure engine at thine hand:
Sword, disc, cup and wand -
Fear no-thing, O warrior of war:
Every man and woman is a star!
Observe thy soul and mind, expand
The universe at your will's command;
A parallel shift in your dimension;
A complete altering of perception.
By the Law of Love and Liberty and Light:
Hail to thee - brave Thelemite!
Should things unmentionable appear
Before the mirror mind of the seer,
And evocations from the deep
Restless realm of astral sleep,
Constrained by talisman and rune
And the wild enchantment of the moon,
Banish all forms unto the void
With thine angel at thy side.
By unforeseen sorrows, beyond the veil:
A mind compelled to darkness - Hail
To thee, prophet of the sun
And tremble at the dark deeds done,
Thou shalt not perish, thine heart be still:
Love is the law, love under will.
And thy life radiates with Light:
Hail to thee - brave Thelemite!
Barry Van-Asten
Why become a Thelemite?
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.
We are all as conscious beings performing acts of magick, whether we are aware of the fact or not; the very process of existence is an act of magick and so is every conscious moment throughout one’s life.
As corporeal, sentient beings in which an infinite spirit body is ‘temporarily’ confined in finite matter, our experiences, both past and present, form the flux-like state of ‘perceptive being’ which allows us to integrate into the ‘illusion’ of reality. We are receptive to the world around us and having the power of will allows us to make conscious choices. In choosing to perform the Great Work you are making a positive and definite declaration to the universe of your intent. It is not something to be taken lightly for along the way oaths are taken and renewed: Initiation= commitment, devotion and affirmation (magickal oaths). In accepting the Word of the Law as given in Liber AL vel Legis, you have taken the initiative towards acting in accordance with your True Will.
‘All initiation must begin with an Act of Truth, a definite commitment which affirms and seals the faith of the Aspirant that success in the Great Work is of a higher value than any other conceivable good... It is therefore an absolute rule in this work of establishing among men the kingdom of the Aeon of Heru-Ra-Ha, that every aspirant is required, right at the start, to make a crucial decision, to take an irrevocable step without receiving full information as to its significance and without security. The clinging to safety in one form or another is the mark of a Slave. To break it quite simply and completely is the only mode open to the aspirant of asserting the Kingly nature. This is the first necessity and the first ordeal is designed to accomplish it.’ [Norman Mudd, letter to Marion Clark, undated, quoted from ‘Perdurabo’. R. Kaczynski. 2002 – revised and expanded edition 2010. p. 400]
In embarking upon this great journey, the aspirant will find the subtle harmony and equilibrium that drives their every emotion, magnified, as the will begins to work unconsciously towards a desired end; just as when one wakes from sleep, one’s immediate thought is not ‘I am breathing!’ for one has been breathing continuously since the first breath of life. In fact, the very moment your attention is brought upon a particular function of the body, the focus upon it is usually to inform us that there is something wrong which needs addressing. In not acting in accordance with the True Will, certain consequences will come about whether you like it or not! Therefore, it is the intention of every Thelemite to attain to the Knowledge and Conversation of his or her Holy Guardian Angel; only then, in the performing of one’s Great Work can one be secure in the knowledge that the work being undertaking is an essential part of one’s progression upon the path, just as if it were the fruit which blooms upon the Tree of Life!
‘For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of result, is every way perfect.’
[AL:I.44]
But this is no easy task, in fact, it may appear that everything is conspiring against you and all manner of obstacles occur to deter you from the work and pursuing your rightful course. It takes an exceptionally strong mind and body (no doubt tempered by the practice of yoga) to forge ahead through the ordeals and ever increasing reasons not to be a Thelemite and not to do the Great Work. The aspirant will have definite consequences and noticeable changes around them which should be recorded objectively in their magical diary. I know of one instance in which a person known to me who was considered to be a ‘lucky person’ found that upon taking the oath of a probationer all element of ‘luck’ had completely dried-up, the notion of luck being something ungovernable and thus ‘outside’ the sphere of the aspirant.
The young Thelemite will find that their mind and body rebels at the mere thought of the work ahead and they will invent excuses for not doing the work (this is a natural human reaction and occurs with every true seeker of the light), but the young aspirant must persevere. You will, no doubt, encounter terrifying forms but fear is failure and onwards you must travel!
‘Fear not at all; fear neither men nor Fates, nor gods, nor anything. Money fear not, nor laughter of the folk folly, nor any other power in heaven or upon the earth or under the earth.’ [AL:III.17]
You will find that the expansion of the magical faculty will inflate the ego beyond reasonable proportions which happens when one is on an inward journey of self-analysis and this too must be kept in check. In fact, to a certain degree, you will find a detachment from the rest of humanity and this is so for all spiritual quests. An ‘aspirant on the threshold of Initiation finds himself assailed by the “complexes” which have corrupted him, their externalisation excruciating him, and his agonised reluctance to their elimination plunging him into such ordeals that he seems (both to himself and others) to have turned from a noble and upright man into an unutterable scoundrel’. [Aleister Crowley quoted in ‘What you should know about the Golden Dawn’. I. Regardie. 1985. p. 77]
But in all things must you keep silent about your work, for those around you, friends and family, through ignorance and conflicting ideas about magick and Thelema, believing great harm will come to you, will do all they can to deter you and ‘save your soul!’
During the Christian era, we were bullied into the belief that everyone is born a sinner and shall die the same, and so we could never really attain perfection and salvation in God’s eyes, with the continual threat of celestial judgement, persecution and damnation. But sins committed in life can be forgiven and absolved if one confesses and repents of those sins and performs acts of penance – this is the Biblical loophole that gave Christians the opportunity for committing sins, after all it was expected of them being only weak creatures of God!
A Thelemite turns this upon its head and takes full responsibility for their course of actions and does not plead with a so-called ‘superior’ being for forgiveness. A Thelemite does not sit back and rely on fate to blow them to some distant conclusion; a Thelemite takes control of their will and in turn of their life. ‘The word of Sin is Restriction.’ [AL:I.42]
Thelema works differently for each individual because we are all unique, not just in our thoughts, emotions and our character, but in every way – there is no-one like you! There never has been anyone like you and there never will be anyone like you ever! But of course, all spiritual endeavours can leave the aspirant feeling alone at times but there is ever a true link with those great entities that have walked this path before us, and those who are taking their first steps now.
So why would anyone in their right mind become a Thelemite? Because you have an overwhelming desire to fulfil your potential and become that which you are destined to become through magical attainment. Because your heart resonates to the beauty and inner understanding of Liber AL vel Legis and you have accepted the Law of Thelema. And because you wish to make an active difference in your life! Thelema is not a set of rules to govern your life, it is much more than that – it is your very existence! As Thelemites, we are taking full possession of our inner and outer universe (as above so below) and there is no greater responsibility than that, for the Thelemite acts at the centre of that universe, and is indeed – God!
‘Thou hast no right but to do thy will.
Do that, and no other shall say nay.’
[AL:I.42-43]
Love is the law, love under will.
P.A.A.A.
Capricornus
A model of pure reason,
He bounds to the glory of the day,
Awake, with a galaxy of imagination
That corrupts and conquers in his way.
Upon his noble brow - distinction,
Creases with time where horizons play;
Immortal in the dawn's expansion
That looks on the crimson waste, to pray
As he struts aflame through every nation -
Vile, the tongue that speaks his name.
It is but one to him: religion -
They are but mirrors of the same.
And in his abysmal trail of devotion
He can compel each heart to shame;
Extreme upon extreme abstraction,
Curled by the blasphemy of his frame.
His torso, a war-engine of destruction,
Monstrous in his will to pursue;
His brain: a trigger of perception
Sees the cosmos streaming through
To stride the elements of perfection
And sing, as lover to lover, will do;
Where the wide excellerated passions
Lies weeping in the glistening dew.
Bored by the limits of cruel creation
He broods on a world, unable to forget
The grind of the axle to every motion;
The sacred scratchings of the prophet.
Thick and rounded, this dimension
Strains to express the course that's set
Through the lower regions of comprehension,
And the perfect beauty of woman. Yet,
His eyes are flames of satisfaction,
Bristling with strength and vibrant with lust,
To redeem the madness of evolution
And crush a universe into dust.
Barry Van-Asten
LIBER RESH vel HELIOS
SUB FIGURA CC [1]
‘The light is mine; its rays consume
Me: I have made a secret door
Into the House of Ra and Tum,
Of Kephra and of Ahathoor.’
[Liber AL vel Legis. III: 38]
Liber Resh vel Helios is an important ritual performed four times daily at dawn, noon, sunset and midnight by the aspirant in adoration of the sun. The practitioner radiates the solar Light and connects magically with the energy of the Aeon of Horus. ‘The object of this practice is firstly to remind the aspirant at regular intervals of the Great Work; secondly, to bring him into conscious personal relation with the centre of our system; and thirdly, for advanced students, to make actual magical contact with the spiritual energy of the sun and thus to draw actual force from him.’ [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. Arkana. 1989. p. 674]. In performing the ritual the aspirant is identifying with the Great Beast 666 whose number is that of the sun [2]. The sun also pertains to Tiphereth (beauty and harmony) on the Tree of Life which relates to the number six and thus reminds the practitioner that the body is also an image of the Tree and the aspiration towards the Knowledge and Conversation of his or her Holy Guardian Angel.
O. These are the adorations to be performed by aspirants to the A∴A∴
1. Let him greet the Sun at dawn, facing East, giving the sign of his grade [3]. And let him say in a loud voice: Hail unto Thee who art Ra in Thy rising, even unto Thee who art Ra in Thy strength, who travellest over the Heavens in Thy bark at the Uprising of the Sun. Tahuti standeth in His splendour at the prow, and Ra-Hoor abideth at the helm. Hail unto Thee from the abodes of Night!
2. Also at Noon, let him greet the Sun, facing South, giving the sign of his grade. And let him say in a loud voice: Hail unto Thee who art Ahathoor in Thy triumphing, even unto Thee who art Ahathoor in Thy beauty, who travellest over the Heavens in Thy bark at the Mid-course of the Sun. Tahuti standeth in His splendour at the prow, and Ra-Hoor abideth at the helm. Hail unto Thee from the abodes of Morning!
3. Also, at Sunset, let him greet the Sun, facing West, giving the sign of his grade. And let him say in a loud voice: Hail unto Thee who art Tum in Thy setting, even unto Thee who art Tum in Thy joy, who travellest over the Heavens in Thy bark at the Down-going of the Sun. Tahuti standeth in His splendour at the prow, and Ra-Hoor abideth at the helm. Hail unto Thee from the abodes of Day!
4. Lastly, at Midnight, let him greet the Sun, facing North, giving the sign of his grade, and let him say in a loud voice: Hail unto Thee who art Kephra in Thy hiding, even unto Thee who art Kephra in Thy silence, who travellest over the Heavens in Thy bark at the Midnight Hour of the Sun. Tahuti standeth in His splendour at the prow, and Ra-Hoor abideth at the helm. Hail unto Thee from the abodes of Evening!
5. And after each of these invocations thou shalt give the sign of silence [4], and afterward thou shalt perform the adoration that is taught thee by thy Superior [5]. And then do thou compose Thyself to holy meditation.
6. Also it is better if in these adorations thou assume the God-form of Whom thou adorest, as if thou didst unite with Him in the adoration of That which is beyond Him [6].
7. Thus shalt thou ever be mindful of the Great Work which thou hast undertaken to perform, and thus shalt thou be strengthened to pursue it unto the attainment of the Stone of the wise, the Summum Bonum, True Wisdom and Perfect Happiness.
Notes:
1. CC=200 in Roman numerals. The letter Resh in Hebrew has the value of 200.
2. 666=6x111. [1+2+3+4+5+6...+36: The sum of the numbers in the magic square of the Sun.
3. ‘the sign of his grade’, this can be substituted with the sign of the grade of Neophyte or more correctly to correspond with the God and the quarter during the adoration: at dawn the sign of Osiris Risen [the X of LVX signs] symbolic of the pentagram (arms crossed, right over left upon the breast). Ra is the Egyptian God of the Sun. At noon the sign of Fire [the sign of the grade of 4=7] and the Goddess Thoum-aesh-neith (extend the fingers on both hands, joining the forefingers and thumbs to form an upward pointing triangle, placed upon the forehead. Ahathoor is an Egyptian Goddess similar to the Greek Aphrodite or the Roman Venus. At sunset the sign of Air [the sign of the grade of 2=9] and the God Shu (arms at right angles and hands facing upwards above the head as if supporting the sky). Tum is the Egyptian God of the West, the setting sun. At midnight the sign of Water [the sign of the grade of 3=8] and the Goddess Auromoth (let the tips of the forefingers and thumbs touch to make a downward pointing triangle, placed upon the solar plexus). Kephra is the Egyptian God depicted as a celestial scarab beetle that rolls the sun across the heavens. All these signs of the grades are given in ‘Magick in Theory and Practice’ by Aleister Crowley, plate 3 opposite page 200.
4. The sign of silence represents the God Hoor-par-kraat and is given by pressing the forefinger (or the thumb) to the lips.
5. This adoration is that which is given in Liber AL vel Legis, chapter III, verses 37 and 38:
Unity uttermost showed!
I adore the might of thy breath,
Supreme and terrible God,
Who makest the gods and death
To tremble before Thee:
I, I adore thee!
Appear on the throne of Ra!
Open the ways of the Khu!
Lighten the ways of the Ka!
The ways of the Khabs run through
To stir me or still me!
Aum! Let it fill me!
The light is mine; its rays consume
Me: I have made a secret door
Into the House of Ra and Tum,
Of Kephra and of Ahathoor.
I am thy Theban, O Mentu,
The Prophet Ankh-af-na-khonsu!
By Bes-na-Maut my breast I beat;
By wise Ta-Nech I weave my spell.
Show thy star-splendour, O Nuit!
Bid me within thine House to dwell,
O winged snake of light, Hadit!
Abide with me, Ra-Hooor-Khuit!
6. For the assumption of God-forms it will help the student to read Liber O Vel Manus et Sagittae, sub figura VI which can be found in The Equinox volume I, number II. p. 11 and in ‘Magick in Theory and Practice’ by Aleister Crowley, appendix VI, p. 448 in the Symonds and Grant 1973 publication [1986 edition]. In my own practices I make the small addition of performing the Qabalistic Cross from the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram at the end, thus strengthening the identification with the Tree of Life:
a. Facing East, touch your forehead and say ‘Ateh’ (Hebrew form of ‘thou’ attributed to Kether on the Tree of Life).
b. Touch your breast and say ‘Aiwass’ (attributed to Tiphereth on the Tree of Life). You may substitute your own Guardian Angel’s name here when it is known to you.
c. Touch the genital region and say ‘Malkuth’ (Hebrew for ‘Kingdom’ and attributed to Malkuth on the Tree of Life).
d. Touch your right shoulder and say ‘Ve-Geburah’ (Hebrew for ‘and the power’ attributed to Geburah on the Tree of Life).
e. Touch your left shoulder and say ‘Ve-Gedulah’ (Hebrew for ‘and the glory’).
f. Clasping your hands upon your breast say ‘le-Olahm, Amen’ (Hebrew for ‘To the ages, amen’). [The Qabalistic Cross as given in Liber XXV The Star Ruby may also be substituted]. Following this I end with the words
P.A.A.A.
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.
Love is the law, love under will.
The Moon Haunt of Silence
To Norman Mudd M.A.
of Trinity College, Cambridge
(1889-1934)
This bountiful bower, where shadows play
To the sunlit kissed afternoon;
A sensual enchantment that seals the day
For the drawing down of the moon.
A fragrance of roses fills the glade
Beneath a mad moonlit scene;
Where the willow sheds her murderous shade
In a sacred space, serene.
Where tiny creatures stir at night
Between stone and stretching root;
Scaring those who conjure fright
And eat of the poisonous fruit.
A foxglove hollow and a madness born;
A monstrous glimmer of moonlight shook
The radiant magic till the mystic morn
Wakes to the shimmering woodland brook.
And here, by a sacerdotal shrine
Knelt one whose soul in silence dwelt,
To the eternal entrancement and sublime
Quintessence of the heart. He felt
Drawn to the Law of the strong, but he
Was held by the grim hand of fate;
Torn between mankind and misery
He chose cold silence - Omnia Pro Veritate!
The Moon Haunt of Silence
To Norman Mudd M.A.
of Trinity College, Cambridge
(1889-1934)
This bountiful bower, where shadows play
To the sunlit kissed afternoon;
A sensual enchantment that seals the day
For the drawing down of the moon.
A fragrance of roses fills the glade
Beneath a mad moonlit scene;
Where the willow sheds her murderous shade
In a sacred space, serene.
Where tiny creatures stir at night
Between stone and stretching root;
Scaring those who conjure fright
And eat of the poisonous fruit.
A foxglove hollow and a madness born;
A monstrous glimmer of moonlight shook
The radiant magic till the mystic morn
Wakes to the shimmering woodland brook.
And here, by a sacerdotal shrine
Knelt one whose soul in silence dwelt,
To the eternal entrancement and sublime
Quintessence of the heart. He felt
Drawn to the Law of the strong, but he
Was held by the grim hand of fate;
Torn between mankind and misery
He chose cold silence - Omnia Pro Veritate!
Barry Van-Asten
PERDURABO
Exile from humankind! The snow’s fresh flakes
Are warmer than men’s hearts. My mind is wrought
Into dark shapes of solitary thought
That loves and sympathises, but awakes
No answering love or pity. What a pang
Hath this strange solitude to aggravate
The self-abasement and the blows of Fate!
No snake of hell hath so severe a fang!
I am not lower than all men – I feel
Too keenly. Yet my place is not above,
Though I have this – unalterable Love
In every fibre. I am crucified
Apart on a lone burning crag of steel,
Tortured, cast out; and yet – I shall abide.
[Aleister Crowley. The Collected Works, volume I. p. 118]
LIBER XLIV(1)
THE MASS OF THE PHOENIX
The Magician, his breast bare, stands before an altar on which are his Burin (2), Bell, Thurible (3), and two of the Cakes of Light (4). In the Sign of the Enterer (5) he reaches West (6) across the Altar, and cries
Hail Ra, that goest in Thy bark
Into the caverns of the Dark!
He gives the sign of Silence (7), and takes the Bell, and Fire, in his hands.
East of the Altar see me stand
With Light and Musick in mine hand!
He strikes Eleven times upon the Bell
333 – 55555 – 333 (8)
and places the Fire in the Thurible .
I strike the Bell: I Light the Flame:
I utter the mysterious name
ABRAHADABRA (9)
He strikes Eleven times upon the Bell
333 – 55555 – 333
Now I begin to pray: Thou Child,
Holy Thy name and undefiled!
Thy reign is come; Thy will is done.
Here is the Bread; here is the Blood.
Bring me through midnight to the Sun!
Save me from Evil and from Good!
That Thy one crown of all the Ten
Even now and here be mine. Amen.
He puts the first Cake to the Fire of the Thurible.
I burn the incense-cake, proclaim
These adorations of Thy name.
He makes them as in Liber Legis (10), and strikes again Eleven times upon the Bell.
333 – 55555 – 333
With the Burin he then makes upon his breast the proper sign (11).
Behold this bleeding breast of mine
Gashed with the sacramental sign!
He puts the second Cake to the wound.
I staunch the blood; the wafer soaks
It up, and the high priest invokes!
He eats the second Cake.
This Bread I eat. This Oath I swear
As I enflame myself with prayer:
“There is no grace: there is no guilt:
This is the Law: DO WHAT THOU WILT!”
He strikes Eleven times upon the Bell,
333 – 55555 – 333
and cries
ABRAHADABRA.
I entered in with woe; with mirth
I now go forth, and with thanksgiving,
To do my pleasure on the earth
Among the legions of the living.
He goeth forth.
Notes:
This Solar Eucharistic ceremony first appeared in Crowley’s ‘The Book of Lies’ [333] in 1913 e.v. as Chapter 44. Also as a companion to the Mass see Chapter 62 in ‘The Book of Lies’. The Mass of the Phoenix is also given in ‘Magick in Theory and Practice’ by Crowley in Appendix VI.
1. XLIV= 44 which is DM in Hebrew and means ‘blood’.
2. Burin. A sharp pointed metal inscribing tool used for carving symbols and words upon candles etc. 3. Thurible. A covered metal censor for burning incense.
4. Cakes of Light. See Liber AL vel Legis. III. 23.
5. The Sign of the Enterer, also the sign of Horus. Step forward onto the left foot and thrust both hands forward. See the illustration ‘Blind Force’ in the ‘Special Supplement’ John St John in The Equinox. Vol I. number 1 (March 1909 e.v.)
6. West. The setting Sun – Tum, God of the West and of the sun at night.
7. The Sign of Silence, also the sign of Harpocrates. Right foot faces forward, left foot slightly behind and facing a little to the left. Right forefinger placed upon the lower lip (sometimes the thumb is used). See the illustration ‘The Silent Watcher’ facing page 6 in The Equinox. Vol I. number 1 (March 1909 e.v.)
8. Eleven times upon the Bell. 11 is the number of Magick and the battery of strikes upon the Bell have a planetary significance: 3= Saturn and 5= Mars.
9. ABRAHADABRA. As Thelema is the Word of the Law, ABRAHADABRA is the Magick Word of the Aeon of Horus. The eleven letters represent the Great Work accomplished for they declare the union of that which is above and that which is below, the Macrocosm and the Microcosm, the Hexagram and the Pentagram or Spirit and man. The five letter A’s (Alephs) symbolise the pentagram and the other six letters the Hexagram. The Word has the value of 418 in the Hebrew numerical system of the Qabbalah which is the number of the Great Work. It is also the number of the letter Cheth spelled in full. Crowley’s home on the banks of Loch Ness ‘Boleskine’ also has the value of 418: Beth, Vau, Lamed, shin, kaph, Yod, Nun =418 and so does AIWASS. See Liber 777 ‘Sepher Sephiroth’, ‘Magick in Theory and Practice’ part III, Chapter 7; ‘The Temple of Solomon the King’ in The Equinox. Vol I. number v and vii.
10. The Adorations are given in Liber AL vel Legis. III. 37-38.
Unity uttermost showed!
I adore the might of thy breath,
Supreme and terrible God,
Who makest the gods and death
To tremble before Thee:
I,
I adore thee!
Appear on the throne of Ra!
Open the ways of the Khu!
Lighten the ways of the Ka!
The ways of the Khabs run through
To stir me or still me!
Aum! Let it fill me!
The light is mine; its rays consume
Me: I have made a secret door
Into the House of Ra and Tum,
Of Kephra and of Ahathoor.
I am thy Theban, O Mentu,
The Prophet Ankh-af-na-khonsu!
By Bes-na-Maut my breast I beat;
By wise Ta-Nech I weave my spell.
Show thy star-splendour, O Nuit!
Bid me within thine House to dwell,
O winged snake of light, Hadit!
Abide with me, Ra-Hooor-Khuit!
11. The proper sign. An ‘X’ within a circle or the Mark of the Beast: the sun and the moon conjoined. Having been charged by the solar energy, the blood is consumed by the Magician which then nourishes the body. The literal form of this Mass is simplistic and beautiful but I believe Crowley had no intention of its practitioners inflicting harm upon themselves on a daily basis and for this matter Chapter 12 ‘Of the Bloody Sacrifice’ in ‘Magick in Theory and Practice’ should be made a careful study of.
P.A.A.A.
illustration: B.Van-Asten
'For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of result, is every way perfect'.
Liber AL: I,44.
LINES UPON A PORTRAIT OF MISTER EDWARD ALEXANDER CROWLEY
Lion, you fix your stare upon your prey
And sit, as some oyster-gorged demi-god;
With eyes like Death's nostrils, smoking hate,
And your fingers manicured like vampire stakes.
Dreamer of discord and demons and darkness -
Confuser of hearts and sex: you sit
Like a bow-tied Osiris, adrift in the tomb,
With a brain full of chess nonsense...
And the menace of Choronzon's distant star
Penetrates beyond the confines of mind,
Bent with hunger, the soul assumes
A persistence of darkness that remains
As you stagger shaven-headed into the unknown -
Nosferatu bringing pestilence from afar...
And in old age - a portly Pan
Sipping Cognac at the Cafe Royal,
Manipulating forces around you
With simple gestures and words of power.
And his eyes through winding pipe smoke glare
As death flowers, amidst the stones,
Dark with pagan poetry... Flames
Toast his solemn heart... He comes
Like a huge bulk of Godhood, summoned
To the enchanted scent of flesh and song!
And in your defence, Monsieur Beast,
A sigh of surety and relief,
Handed down and placed in hearts -
A kiss from Kingdoms great and far:
A law unto our lovely star
And a dream of love for who we are!
Sat like Satan in your Trinity room -
Great Beast of your mother - Leamington man!
Lilith-scented, you huffed and you puffed
Through the galaxies of faith and waste;
Through the gardens of the damned
And every haunted place... But
What was said? What bombs of wit
Were delivered before the camera click?
With your sails full, you were unstoppable,
Crossing continents... a cocained collosus
Who had outgrown the human, and known
The habitation of the Gods, and what they are.
But the human lingered still, and sat
Heavy with its failures on your brow -
And now, what man of iron will shall come
To watch over the aeon, and sing
A lament for the World Ash, wonder sap?
A song of all time, to bring
A light from afar, to worship still -
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.
Love is the law, love under will.
Barry Van-Asten
LIBER CL
DE LEGE LIBELLUM
Preface
THE LAW
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.
IN RIGHTEOUSNESS OF HEART come hither, and listen: for it is I, TO MEGA THERION, who gave this Law unto everyone that holdeth himself holy. It is I, not another, that willeth your whole Freedom, and the arising within you of full Knowledge and Power.
Behold! the Kingdom of God is within you, even as the Sun standeth eternal in the heavens, equal at midnight and at noon. He riseth not: he setteth not: it is but the shadow of the earth which concealeth him, or the clouds upon her face.
Let me then declare unto you this Mystery of the Law, as it hath been made known unto me in divers places, upon the mountains and in the deserts, but also in great cities, which thing I speak for your comfort and good courage. And so be it unto all of you.
Know first, that from the Law spring four Rays or Emanations: so that if the Law be the centre of your own being, they must needs fill you with their secret goodness. And these four are Light, Life, Love, and Liberty.
By Light shall ye look upon yourselves, and behold All Things that are in Truth One Thing only, whose name hath been called No Thing for a cause which later shall be declared unto you. But the substance of Light is Life, since without Existence and Energy it were naught. By Life therefore are you made yourselves, eternal and incorruptible, flaming forth as suns, self-created and self-supported, each the sole centre of the Universe.
Now by the Light ye beheld, by Love ye feel. There is an ecstacy of pure Knowledge, and another of pure Love. And this Love is the force that uniteth things diverse, for the contemplation in Light of their Oneness. Know that the Universe is not at rest, but in extreme motion whose sum is Rest. And this understanding that Stability is Change, and Change Stability, that Being is Becoming, and Becoming Being, is the Key to the Golden Palace of this Law.
Lastly, by Liberty is the power to direct your course according to your Will. For the extent of the Universe is without bounds, and ye are free to make your pleasure as ye will, seeing that the diversity of being is infinite also. For this also is the Joy of the Law, that no two stars are alike, and ye must understand also that this Multiplicity is itself Unity, and without it Unity could not be. And this is an hard saying against Reason: ye shall comprehend, when, rising above Reason, which is but a manipulation of the Mind, ye come to pure Knowledge by direct perception of the Truth.
Know also that these four Emanations of the Law flame forth upon all paths: ye shall use them not only in these Highways of the Universe whereof I have written, but in every By-path of your daily life.
Love is the law, love under will.
I
OF LIBERTY
IT IS OF LIBERTY that I would first write unto you, for except ye be free to act, ye cannot act. Yet all four gifts of the Law must in some degree be exercised, seeing that these four are one. But for the Aspirant that cometh unto the Master, the first need is freedom.
The great bond of all bonds is ignorance. How shall a man be free to act if he know not his own purpose? You must therefore first of all discover which star of all the stars you are, your relation to the other stars about you, and your relation to, and identity with, the Whole.
In our Holy Books are given sundry means of making this discovery, and each must make it for himself, attaining absolute conviction by direct experience, not merely reasoning and calculating what is probable. And to each will come the knowledge of his finite will, whereby one is a poet, one prophet, one worker in steel, another in jade. But also to each be the knowledge of his infinite Will, his destiny to perform the Great Work, the realization of his True Self. Of this Will let me therefore speak clearly unto all, since it pertaineth unto all.
Understand now that in yourselves is a certain discontent. Analyse well its nature: at the end is in every case one conclusion. The ill springs from the belief in two things, the Self and the Not-Self, and the conflict between them. This also is a restriction of the Will. He who is sick is in conflict with his own body: he who is poor is at odds with society: and so for the rest. Ultimately, therefore, the problem is how to destroy this perception of duality, to attain to the apprehension of unity.
Now then let us suppose that you have come to the Master, and that He has declared to you the Way of this attainment. What hindereth you? Alas! there is yet much Freedom afar off.
Understand clearly this: that if you are sure of your Will, and sure of your means, then any thoughts or actions which are contrary to those means are contrary also to that Will.
If therefore the Master should enjoin upon you a Vow of Holy Obedience, compliance is not a surrender of the Will, but a fulfilment thereof.
For see, what hindereth you? It is either from without or from within, or both. It may be easy for the strong-minded seeker to put his heel upon public opinion, or to tear from his heart the objects which he loves, in a sense: but there will always remain in himself many discordant affections, as also the bond of habit, and these also must he conquer.
In our holiest Book it is written: “Thou hast no right but to do thy will. Do that, and no other shall say nay.” Write it also in your heart and in your brain: for this is the key of the whole matter.
Here Nature herself be your preacher: for in every phenomenon of force and motion doth she proclaim aloud this truth. Even in so small a matter as driving a nail into a plank, hear this same sermon. Your nail must be hard, smooth, fine-pointed, or it will not move swiftly in the direction willed. Imagine then a nail of tinder-wood with twenty points--it is verily no longer a nail. Yet nigh all mankind are like unto this. They wish a dozen different careers; and the force which might have been sufficient to attain eminence in one is wasted on the others: they are null.
Here then let me make open confession, and say thus: though I pledged myself almost in boyhood to the Great Work, though to my aid came the most puissant forces in the whole Universe to hold me to it, though habit itself now constraineth me in the right direction, yet I have not fulfilled my Will: I turn aside daily from the appointed task. I waver. I falter. I lag.
Let this then be of great comfort to you all, that if I be so imperfect--and for very shame I have not emphasized that imperfection--if I, the chosen one, still fail, then how easy for yourselves to surpass me! Or, should you only equal me, then even so how great attainment should be yours!
Be of good cheer, therefore, since both my failure and my success are arguments of courage for yourselves.
Search yourselves cunningly, I pray you, analysing your inmost thoughts. And first you shall discard all those gross obvious hindrances to your Will: idleness, foolish friendships, waste employments or enjoyments, I will not enumerate the conspirators against the welfare of your State.
Next, find the minimum of daily time which is in good sooth necessary to your natural life. The rest you shall devote to the True Means of your Attainment. And even these necessary hours you shall consecrate to the Great Work, saying consciously always while at these Tasks that you perform them only in order to preserve your body and mind in health for the right application to that sublime and single Object.
It shall not be very long before you come to understand that such a life is the true Liberty. You will feel distractions from your Will as being what they are. They will no longer appear pleasant and attractive, but as bonds, as shames. And when you have attained this point, know that you have passed the Middle Gate of this Path. For you will have unified your Will.
Even thus, were a man sitting in a theatre where the play wearies him, he would welcome every distraction, and find amusement in any accident: but if he were intent upon the play, every such incident would annoy him. His attitude to these is then an indication of his attitude towards the play itself.
At first the habit of attention is hard to acquire. Persevere, and you will have spasms of revulsion periodically. Reason itself will attack you, saying: how can so strict a bondage be the Path of Freedom?
Persevere. You have never yet known Liberty. When the temptations are overcome, the voice of Reason silenced, then will your soul bound forward unhampered upon its chosen course, and for the first time will you experience the extreme delight of being Master of Yourself, and therefore of the Universe.
When this is fully attained, when you sit securely in the saddle, then you may enjoy also all those distractions which first pleased you and then angered you. Now then will do neither any more: for they are your slaves and toys.
Until you have reached this point, you are not wholly free. You must kill out desire, and kill out fear. The end of all is the power to live according to your own nature, without danger that one part may develop to the detriment of the whole, or concern lest that danger should arise.
The sot drinks, and is drunken: the coward drinks not, and shivers: the wise man, brave and free, drinks, and gives glory to the Most High God.
This then is the Law of Liberty: you possess all Liberty in your own right, but you must buttress Right with Might: you must win Freedom for yourself in many a war. Woe unto the children who sleep in the Freedom that their forefathers won for them!
“There is no law beyond Do what thou wilt:” but it is only the greatest of the race who have the strength and courage to obey it.
O man! behold thyself! With what pains wast thou fashioned! What ages have gone to thy shaping! The history of the planet is woven into the very substance of thy brain! Was all this for naught? Is there no purpose in thee? Wast thou made thus that thou shouldst eat, and breed, and die? Think it not so! Thou dost incorporate so many elements, thou art the fruit of so many aeons of labour, thou art fashioned thus as thou art, and not otherwise, for some colossal End.
Nerve thyself, then, to seek it and to do it. Naught can satisfy thee but the fulfilment of thy transcendent Will, that is hidden within thee. For this, then, up to arms! Win thine own Freedom for thyself! Strike hard!
II
OF LOVE
IT IS WRITTEN that “Love is the law, love under will.” Herein is an Arcanum concealed, for in the Greek Language Agape, Love, is of the same numerical value as Thelema, Will. By this we understand that the Universal Will is of the nature of Love.
Now Love is the enkindling in ecstacy of Two that will to become One. It is thus an Universal formula of High Magick. For see now how all things, being in sorrow caused by dividuality, must of necessity will Oneness as their medicine.
Here also is Nature monitor to them that seek Wisdom at her breast: for in the uniting of elements of opposite polarities is there a glory of heat, of light, and of electricity. Thus also in mankind do we behold the spiritual fruit of poetry and all genius, arising from the seed of what is but an animal gesture, in the estimation of such as are schooled in Philosophy. And it is to be noted strongly that the most violent and divine passions are those between people of utterly unharmonious natures.
But now I would have you to know that in the mind are no such limitations in respect of species as prevent a man falling in love with an inanimate object, or an idea. For to him that is in any wise advanced upon the Way of Meditation it appears that all objects save the One Object are distasteful, even as appeared formerly in respect of his chance wishes to the Will. So therefore all objects must be grasped by the mind, and heated in the sevenfold furnace of Love, until with explosion of ecstacy they unite, and disappear, for they, being imperfect, are destroyed utterly in the creation of the Perfection of Union, even as the persons of the Lover and the Beloved are fused into the spiritual gold of Love, which knoweth no person, but comprehendeth all.
Yet since each star is but one star, and the coming together of any two is but one partial rapture, so must the aspirant to our holy Science and Art increase constantly by this method of assimilating ideas, that in the end, become capable of apprehending the Universe in one thought, he may leap forth upon It with the massed violence of his Self, and destroying both these, become that Unity whose name is No Thing. Seek ye all therefore constantly to unite yourselves in rapture with each and every thing that is, and that by utmost passion and lust of Union. To this end take chiefly all such things as are naturally repulsive. For what is pleasant is assimilated easily and without ecstacy: it is in the transfiguration of the loathsome and abhorred into The Beloved that the Self is shaken to the root in Love.
Thus in human love also we see that mediocrities among men mate with null women: but History teacheth us that the supreme masters of the world seek ever the vilest and most horrible creatures for their concubines, overstepping even the limiting laws of sex and species in their necessity to transcend normality. It is not enough in such natures to excite lust or passion: the imagination itself must be enflamed by every means.
For us, then, emancipated from all base law, what shall we do to satisfy our Will to Unity? No less a mistress than the Universe: no lupanar more cramped than Infinite Space: no night of rape that is not co-eval with Eternity!
Consider that as Love is mighty to bring forth all Ecstacy, so absence of Love is the greatest craving. Whoso is balked in Love suffereth indeed, but he that hath not actively that passion in his heart towards some object is weary with the ache of craving. And this state is called mystically “Dryness.” For this there is, as I believe, no cure but patient persistence in a Rule of life.
But this Dryness hath its virtue, in that thereby the soul is purged of those things that impeach the Will: for when the drouth is altogether perfect, then is it certain that by no means can the Soul be satisfied, save by the Accomplishment of the Great Work. And this is in strong souls a stimulus to the Will. It is the Furnace of Thirst that burneth up all dross within us.
But to each act of Will is a particular Dryness corresponding: and as Love increaseth within you, so doth the torment of His absence. Be this also unto you for a consolation in the ordeal! Moreover, the more fierce the plague of impotence, the more swiftly and suddenly is it wont to abate.
Here is the method of Love in Meditation. Let the Aspirant first practice and then discipline himself in the Art of fixing the attention upon any thing whatsoever at will, without permitting the least imaginable distraction.
Let him also practice the art of the Analysis of Ideas, and that of refusing to allow the mind its natural reaction to them, pleasant or unpleasant, thus fixing himself in Simplicity and Indifference. These things being achieved in their ripe season, be it known to you that all ideas will have become equal to your apprehension, since each is simple and each indifferent: any one of them remaining in the mind at Will without stirring or striving, or tending to pass on to any other. But each idea will possess one special quality common to all: this, that no one of any of them is The Self, inasmuch as it is perceived by The Self as Something Opposite.
When this is thorough and profound in the impact of its realization, then is the moment for the aspirant to direct his Will to Love upon it, so that his whole consciousness findeth focus upon that One Idea. And at the first it may be fixed and dead, or lightly held. This may then pass into dryness, or into repulsion. Then at last by pure persistence in that Act of Will to Love, shall Love himself arise, as a bird, as a flame, as a song, and the whole Soul shall wing a fiery path of music unto the Ultimate Heaven of Possession.
Now in this method there are many roads and ways, some simple and direct, some hidden and mysterious, even as it is with human love whereof no man hath made so much as the first sketches for a Map: for Love is infinite in diversity even as are the Stars. For this cause do I leave Love himself master in the heart of every one of you: for he shall teach you rightly if you but serve him with diligence and devotion even to abandonment.
Nor shall you take umbrage or surprise at the strange pranks that he shall play: for He is a wayward boy and wanton, wise in the Wiles of Aphrodite Our Lady His sweet Mother: and all His jests and cruelties are spices in a confection cunning as no art may match.
Rejoice therefore in all His play, not remitting in any wise your own ardour, but glowing with the sting of His whips, and making of Laughter itself a sacrament adjuvant to Love, even as in the Wine of Rheims is sparkle and bite, like as they were ministers to the High Priest of its Intoxication.
It is also fit that I write to you of the importance of Purity in Love. Now this matter concerneth not in any wise the object or the method of the practice: the one thing essential is that no alien element should intrude. And this is of most particular pertinence to the aspirant in that primary and mundane aspect of his work wherein he establisheth himself in the method through his natural affections.
For know, that all things are masks or symbols of the One Truth, and nature serveth alway to point out the higher perfection under the veil of the lower perfection. So then all the Art and Craft of human love shall serve you as an hieroglyphic: for it is written that That which is above is like that which is below: and That which is below is like that which is above.
Therefore also doth it behoove you to take well heed lest in any manner you fail in this business of purity. For though each act is to be complete on its own plane, and no influence of any other plane is to be brought in for interference or admixture, for that such is all impurity, yet each act should in itself be so complete and perfect that it is a mirror of the perfection of every other plane, and thereby becometh partaker of the pure Light of the highest. Also, since all acts are to be acts of Will in Freedom on every plane, all planes are in reality but one: and thus the lowest expression of any function of that Will is to be at the same time an expression of the highest Will, or only true Will, which is that already implied in the acceptance of the Law.
Be it also well understood of you that it is not necessary or right to shut off natural activity of any kind, as certain false folk, eunuchs of the spirit, most foully teach, to the destruction of many. For in every thing soever inhereth its own perfection proper to it, and to neglect the full operation and function of any one part bringeth distortion and degeneration to the whole. Act therefore in all ways, but transforming the effect of all these ways to the One Way of the Will. And this is possible, because all ways are in actual Truth One Way, the Universe being itself One and One Only, and its appearance as Multiplicity that cardinal illusion which it is the very object of Love to dissipate.
In the achievement of Love are two principles, that of mastering and that of yielding. But the nature of these is hard to explain, for they are subtle, and are best taught by Love Himself in the course of the operations. But it is to be said generally that the choice of one formula or the other is automatic, being the work of that inmost Will which is alive within you. Seek not then to determine consciously this decision, for herein true instinct is not liable to err.
But now I end, without further words: for in our Holy Books are written many details of the actual practices of Love. And those are the best and truest which are most subtly written in symbol and image, especially in Tragedy and Comedy, for the whole nature of these things is in this kind, Life itself being but the fruit of the flower of Love.
It is then of Life that I must needs now write to you, seeing that by every act of Will in Love you are creating it, a quintessence more mysterious and joyous than you deem, for this which men call life is but a shadow of that true Life, your birthright, and the gift of the Law of Thelema.
III
OF LIFE
SYSTOLE AND DIASTOLE: these are the phases of all component things. Of such also is the life of man. Its curve arises from the latency of the fertilized ovum, say you, to a zenith whence it declines to the nullity of death? Rightly considered, this is not wholly truth. The life of man is but one segment of a serpentine curve which reaches out to infinity, and its zeros but mark the changes from the plus to minus, and minus to plus, coefficients of its equation. It is for this cause, among many others, that wise men in old time chose the Serpent as the Hieroglyph of Life.
Life then is indestructible as all else is. All destruction and construction are changes in the nature of Love, as I have written to you in the former chapter proximate. Yet even as the blood in one pulse-throb of the wrist is not the same blood as that in the next, so individuality is in part destroyed as each life passeth; nay, even with each thought.
What then maketh man, if he dieth and is reborn a changeling with each breath? This: the consciousness of continuity given by memory, the conception of his Self as something whose existence, far from being threatened by these changes, is in verity assured by them. Let then the aspirant to the sacred Wisdom consider his Self no more as one segment of the Serpent, but as the whole. Let him extend his consciousness to regard both birth and death as incidents trivial as systole and diastole of the heart itself, and necessary as they to its function.
To fix the mind in this apprehension of Life, two modes are preferred, as preliminary to the greater realizations to be discussed in their proper order, experiences which transcend even those attainments of Liberty and Love of which I have hitherto written, and this of Life which I now inscribe in this my little book which I am making for you so that you may come unto the Great Fulfilment.
The first mode is the acquisition of the Magical Memory so-called, and the means is described with accuracy and clearness in certain of our Holy Books. But for nearly all men this is found to be a practice of exceeding difficulty. Let then the aspirant follow the impulse of his own Will in the decision to choose this or no.
The second mode is easy, agreeable, not tedious, and in the end as certain as the other. But as the way of error in the former lieth in Discouragement, so in the latter are you to be ware of False Paths. I may say indeed generally of all Works, that there are two dangers, the obstacle of Failure, and the snare of Success.
Now this second mode is to dissociate the beings which make up your life. Firstly, because it is easiest, you should segregate that Form which is called the Body of Light (and also by many other names) and set yourself to travel in this Form, making systematic exploration of those worlds which are to other material things what your own Body of Light is to your own material form.
Now it will occur to you in these travels that you come to many Gates which you are not able to pass. This is because your Body of Light is itself as yet not strong enough, or subtle enough, or pure enough: and you must then learn to dissociate the elements of that Body by a process similar to the first, your consciousness remaining in the higher and leaving the lower. In this practice do you continue, bending your Will like a great Bow to drive the Arrow of your consciousness through heavens ever higher and holier. But the continuance in this Way is itself of vital value: for it shall be that presently habit herself shall persuade you that the body which is born and dieth within so little a space as one cycle of Neptune in the Zodiac is no essential of your Self, that the Life of which you are become partaker, while itself subject to the Law of action and reaction, ebb and flow, systole and diastole, is yet insensible to the afflictions of that life which you formerly held to be your sole bond with Existence.
And here must you resolve your Self to make the mightiest endeavours: for so flowered are the meadows of this Eden, and so sweet the fruit of its orchards, that you will love to linger among them, and to take delight in sloth and dalliance therein. Therefore I write to you with energy that you should not do thus to the hindrance of your true progress, because all these enjoyments are dependent upon duality, so that their true name is Sorrow of Illusion, like that of the normal life of man, which you have set out to transcend.
Be it according to your Will, but learn this, that (as it is written) they only are happy who have desired the unattainable. It is then best, ultimately, if it be your Will to find alway your chiefest pleasure in Love, that is, in Conquest, and in Death, that is, in Surrender, as I have written to you already. Thus then you shall delight in these delights aforesaid, but only as toys, holding your manhood firm and keen to pierce to deeper and holier ecstacies without arrest of Will.
Furthermore, I would have you to know that in this practice, pursued with ardour unquenchable, is this especial grace, that you will come as it were by fortune into states which transcend the practice itself, being of the nature of those Works of Pure Light of which I will to write to you in the chapter following after this. For there be certain Gates which no being who is still conscious of dividuality, that is, of the Self and not-Self as opposites, may pass through: and in the storming of those Gates by fiery assault of lust celestial, your flame will burn vehemently against your gross Self, though it be already divine beyond your present imagining, and devour it in a mystical death, so that in the Passing of the Gate all is dissolved in formless Light of Unity.
Now then, returning from these states of being, and in the return also there is a Mystery of Joy, you will be weaned from the Milk of Darkness of the Moon, and made partaker of the Sacrament of Wine that is the blood of the Sun. Yet at the first there may be shock and conflict, for the old thought persists by force of its habit: it is for you to create by repeated act the true right habit of this consciousness of the Life which abideth in Light. And this is easy, if your will be strong: for the true Life is so much more vivid and quintessential than the false that (as I rudely estimate) one hour of the former makes an impression on the memory equal to one year of the latter. One single experience, in duration it may be but a few seconds of terrestrial time, is sufficient to destroy the belief in the reality of our vain life on earth: but this wears gradually away if the consciousness, through shock or fear, adhere not to it, and the Will strive not continually to repetition of that bliss, more beautiful and terrible than death, which it hath won by virtue of Love.
There be moreover many other modes of attaining the apprehension of true Life, and these two following are of much value in breaking up the ice of your mortal error in the vision of your being. And of these the first is the constant contemplation of the Identity of Love and Death, and the understanding of the dissolution of the body as an Act of Love done upon the Body of the Universe, as also it is written at length in our Holy Books. And with this goeth, as it were sister with twin brother, the practice of mortal love as a sacrament symbolical of that great Death: as it is written “Kill thyself”: and again “Die daily.”
And the second of these lesser modes is the practice of the mental apprehension and analysis of ideas, mainly as I have already taught you, but with especial emphasis in choice of things naturally repulsive, in particular, death itself, and its phenomena ancillary. Thus the Buddha bade his disciples to meditate upon Ten Impurities, that is, upon ten cases of death of decomposition, so that the Aspirant, identifying himself with his own corpse in all these imagined forms, might lose the natural horror, loathing, fear or disgust which he might have had for them. Know this, that every idea of every sort becomes unreal, phantastic, and most manifest illusion, if it be subjected to persistent investigation, with concentration. And this is particularly easy to attain in the case of all bodily impressions, because all material things, and especially those of which we are first conscious, namely, our own bodies, are the grossest and most unnatural of all falsities. For there is in us all, latent, that Light wherein no error may endure, and It already teaches our instinct to reject first of all those veils which are most closely wrapt about It. Thus also in meditation it is (for many men) most profitable to concentrate the Will to Love upon the sacred centres of nervous force: for they, like all things, are apt images or true reflexions of their semblables in finer spheres: so that, their gross natures being dissipated by the dissolving acid of the Meditation, their finer souls appear (so to speak) naked, and display their force and glory in the consciousness of the aspirant.
Yea, verily, let your Will to Love burn eagerly toward this creation in yourselves of the true Life that rolls its waves across the shoreless sea of Time! Live not your petty lives in fear of the hours! The Moon and Sun and Stars by which ye measure Time are themselves but servants of that Life which pulses in you, joyous drum-beat as you march triumphant through the Avenue of the Ages. Then, when each birth and death of yours are recognized in this perception as mere milestones on your ever-living Road, what of the foolish incidents of your mean lives? Are they not grains of sand blown by the desert wind, or pebbles that you spurn with your winged feet, or grassy hollows were you press the yielding and elastic turf and moss with lyrical dances? To him who lives in Life naught matters: his is eternal motion, energy, delight of never-failing Change: unwearied, you pass on from aeon to aeon, from star to star, the Universe your playground, its infinite variety of sport ever old and ever new. All those ideas which bred sorrow and fear are known in their truth, and thus become the seed of joy: for you are certain beyond all proof that you can never die; that, though you change, change is part of your own nature: the Great Enemy is become the Great Ally.
And now, rooted in this perfection, your Self become the very Tree of Life, you have a fulcrum for your lever: you are ready to understand that this pulsation of Unity is itself Duality, and therefore, in the highest and most sacred sense, still Sorrow and Illusion; which having comprehended, aspire yet again, even unto the Fourth of the Gifts of the Law, unto the End of the Path, even unto Light.
IV
OF LIGHT
I PRAY YOU, be patient with me in that which I shall write concerning Light: for here is a difficulty, ever increasing, in the use of words. Moreover, I am myself carried away constantly and overwhelmed by the sublimity of this matter, so that plain speech may whirl into lyric, when I would plod peaceably with didactic, expression. My best hope is that you may understand by virtue of the sympathy of your intuition, even as two lovers may converse in language as unintelligible to others as it seemeth silly, wanton, and dull, or as in that other intoxication given by Ether the partakers commune with infinite wit, or wisdom, as the mood taketh them, by means of a word or a gesture, being initiated to apprehension by the subtlety of the drug. So may I that am inflamed with love of this Light, and drunken on the wine Ethereal of this Light, communicate not so much with your reason and intelligence, but with that principle hidden in yourself which is ready to partake with me. Even so may man and woman become mad with love, no word being spoken between them, because of the induction (as it were) of their souls. And your understanding will depend upon your ripeness for perception of my Truth. Moreover, if so be that Light in you be ready to break forth, then Light will interpret to you these dark words in the language of Light, even as a string inanimate, duly adjusted, will vibrate to its peculiar tone, struck on another cord. Read, therefore, not only with the eye and brain, but with the rhythm of the Life which you have attained by your Will to Love quickened to dancing measure by these words, which are the movements of the wand of my Will to Love, and so to enkindle your Life to Light.
In this mood did I interrupt myself in the writing of this my little book, and for two days and nights sleeplessly have I made consideration, wrestling vehemently with my spirit, lest by haste or carelessness I might fail toward you.
In exercise of Will and of Love are implied motion and change, but in Life is gained an Unity which moveth and changeth only in pulse or in phase, and is even as music. Yet in the attainment of this Life you will already have experienced that the Quintessence thereof is pure Light, an ecstacy formless, and without bound or mark. In this Light naught exists, for It is homogeneous: and therefore have men called it Silence, and Darkness, and Nothing. But in this, as in all other effort to name it, is the root of every falsity and misapprehension, since all words imply some duality. Therefore, though I call it Light, it is not Light, nor absence of Light. Many also have sought to describe it by contradictions, since through transcendent negation of all speech it may by some natures be attained. Also by images and symbols have men striven to express it: but always in vain. Yet those that were ready to apprehend the nature of this Light have understood by sympathy: and so shall it be with you who read this little book, loving it. However, be it known unto you that the best of all instruction on this matter, and the Word best suited to the Aeon of Horus, is written in The Book of the Law. Yet also the Book Ararita is right worthy in the Work of the Light, as Trigrammaton in that of Will, Cordis Cincti Serpente in the Way of Love, and Liberi in that of Life. All these Books also concern all these Four Gifts, for in the end you will see that every one is inseparable from every other.
I wish to write to you with regard to the number 93, the number of Velhma. For it is not only the number of its interpretation Agaph, but also that of a Word unknown to you unless you be Neophyte of our Holy Order of the A∴A∴ which word representeth in itself the arising of the Speech from the Silence, and the return thereunto in the End. Now this number 93 is thrice 31, which is in Hebrew LA, that is to say NOT, and so it denieth extension in the three dimensions of Space. Also I would have you to meditate most closely upon the name NU that is 56, which we are told to divide, add, multiply, and understand. By division cometh forth 0.12, as if it were written Nuith! Hadith! Ra- Hoor-Khuith! before the Dyad. By addition ariseth Eleven, the number of True Magick: and by multiplication Three Hundred, the Number of the Holy Spirit or Fire, the letter Shin, wherein all things are consumed utterly. With these considerations, and a full understanding of the mysteries of the Numbers 666 and 418, you will be armed mightily in this Way of far flight. But you should also consider all numbers in their scales. For there is no means of resolution better than this of pure mathematics, since already therein are gross ideas made fine, and all is ordered and ready for the Alchemy of the Great Work.
I have already written to you of how, in the Will of Love, Light ariseth as the secret part of Life. And in the first, the little, Loves, the attained Life is still personal: later, it becometh impersonal and universal. Now then is Will arrived, may I say so, at its magnetic pole, whence the lines of force point alike every way and no way: and Love also is no more a work, but a state. These qualities are become part of the Universal Life, which proceedeth infinitely with the enjoyment of the Will, and of Love as inherent therein. These things therefore, in their perfection, have lost their names, and their natures. Yet these were the Substance of Life, its Father and Mother: and without their operation and impact Life itself will gradually cease its pulsations. But since the infinite energy of the whole Universe is therein, what then is possible but that it return to its own First Intention, dissolving itself little by little into that Light which is its most secret and most subtle Nature?
For this Universe is in Truth Zero, being an equation whereof Zero is the sum. Whereof this is the proof, that if not, it would be unbalanced, and something would have come from Nothing, which is absurd. This Light or Nothing is then the Resultant or Totality thereof in pure Perfection; and all other states, positive or negative, are imperfect, since they omit their opposites.
Yet, I would have you consider that this equality or identity of equation between all things and No thing is most absolute, so that you will remain no more in the one than you did in the other. And you will understand this greatest Mystery very easily in the light of those other experiences which you will have enjoyed, wherein motion and rest, change and stability, and many other subtle opposites, have been redeemed to identity by the force of your holy meditation.
The greatest gift of the Law, then, cometh forth by the most perfect practice of the Three Lesser Gifts. And so thoroughly must you travail in this Work that you are able to pass from one side of the equation to the other at will: nay, to comprehend the whole at once, and for ever. This then your time-and-space-bound soul shall travel according to its nature in its orbit, revealing the Law to them that walk in chains, for that this is your particular function.
Now here is the Mystery of the Origin of Evil. Firstly, by Evil we mean that which is in opposition to our own wills: it is therefore a relative, and not an absolute, term. For everything which is the greatest evil of some one is the greatest good of some other, just as the hardness of the wood which wearieth the axeman is the safety of him that ventureth himself upon the sea in a ship built of that wood. And this is a truth easy to apprehend, being superficial, and intelligible to the common mind.
All evil is thus relative, or apparent, or illusory: but, returning to philosophy, I will repeat that its root is always in duality. Therefore the escape from this apparent evil is to seek the Unity, which you shall do as I have already shewn you. But I will now make mention of that which is written concerning this in The Book of the Law.
The first step being Will, Evil appears as by this definition, “all that hinders the execution of the Will.” Therefore is it written: “The word of Sin is Restriction.” It should also be noted that in The Book of the Thirty Aethyrs {Book 418} Evil appears as Choronzon whose number is 333, which in Greek importeth Impotence and Idleness: and the nature of Choronzon is Dispersion and Incoherence.
Then in the Way of Love Evil appears as “all that which tends to prevent the Union of any two things.” Thus The Book of the Law sayeth, under the figure of the Voice of Nuit: “take your fill and will of love as ye will, when, where and with whom ye will! But always unto me.” For every act of Love must be “under will,” that is, in accordance with the True Will, which is not to rest content with things partial and transitory, but to proceed firmly to the End. So also, in The Book of the Thirty Aethyrs, the Black Brothers are those who shut themselves up, unwilling to destroy themselves by Love.
Thirdly, in the Way of Life Evil appears under a subtler form as “all that which is not impersonal and universal.” Here The Book of the Law, by the Voice of Hadit, informeth us: “In the sphere I am everywhere the centre”. And again: “I am Life and the giver of Life” {....} “‘Come unto me’ is a foolish word: for it is I that go.” “For I am perfect, being Not”. For this Life is in every place and time at once, so that in It these limitations no longer exist. And you will have seen this for yourself, that in every act of Love time and space disappear with the creation of the Life by its virtue, as also doth personality itself. For the third time, then, in even subtler sense, “The word of Sin is Restriction.”
Lastly, in the Way of Light this same versicle is the key to the conception of Evil. But here Restriction is in the failure to solve the Great Equation, and, later, to prefer one expression or phase of the Universe to the other. Against this we are warned in The Book of the Law by the Word of Nuit, saying: “None” {....} “and two. For I am divided for love's sake, for the chance of union”, and therefore, “If this be not aright: if ye confound the space marks, saying: They are one: or saying, They are many;” {....} “then expect the direful judgments” {....}
Now therefore by the favour of Thoth am I come to the end of this my book: and do you arm yourselves accordingly with the Four Weapons: the Wand for Liberty, the Cup for Love, the Sword for Life, the Disk for Light: and with these work all wonders by the Art of High Magick under the Law of the New Aeon, whose Word is Thelema.
[The Equinox. Volume III, number I, p. 99]
CROWLEY IN CAMBRIDGE
By AUDRAREP
By AUDRAREP
'At Cambridge I was surrounded by a more or less happy, healthy, prosperous set of parasites'.
[The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 119]
Crowley attended 51 Bateman Street from 1885 when he was aged nine until 1888. The school was run by the Rev. Henry d'Arcy Champney [1854-1942] who was born in Yorkshire. He went up to Corpus Christi College, Cambridge on 1st October 1874 and attained his B.A. in 1875 and his M.A. in 1881. He was ordained as a Church of England Deacon in 1875 and a Priest at Ely in 1879. He became a Brethren in 1882. He started the school for the sons of Brethren. In 1879 the house was owned by George Procter.
In Crowley's 'A Boyhood in Hell' from 'The World's Tragedy' he says that 'the Revd. H. d'Arcy Champney, M.A. of Corpus Christi College, Cambridge, had come out of sect. He had voted at the parliamentary elections by crossing out the names of the candidates and writing, 'I vote for king Jesus.'
'He had started a school for the sons of Brethren at 51 Bateman Street, Cambridge. May God bite into the bones of men the pain of that hell on earth (I have prayed often) that by them it may be sowed with salt, accursed for ever! May the maiden that passes it be barren and the pregnant woman that beholdeth it abort! May the birds of the air refuse to fly over it! May it stand as a curse, as a fear, as an hate, among men! May the wicked dwell therein! May the light of the sun be witheld therefrom and the light of the moon not lighten it! May it become the home of the shells of the dead and may the demons of the pit inhabit it! May it be accursed, accursed - accursed for ever and ever!'
'My first step must be to get into personal
communication with the devil.'
[Confessions. P. 126]
Crowley went up to Cambridge in the Michaelmas Term [Tuesday 1st October] of 1895, just eleven days short of his twentieth birthday and his first residence was 16 St John's Street. He had entered for the Moral Science Tripos thinking it would stand him in good stead and teach him something about the 'nature of things', but he was 'profoundly disgusted to find that political economy was one of the subjects. I attended the first lecture; the professor told us that the subject was a very difficult one because there were no reliable data. It is easy to imagine the effect of such a statement on a boy who had been trained in the exactitude of mathematics and chemistry. I closed my notebook and never attended another lecture.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 108]
From his window at 16 St John's Street Crowley liked to look out to the Tower of St John's College and it was here where he would have discovered the poetry of Shelley and read the complete works of such authors as: Edward Gibbon (1737-1794), Thomas Carlyle (1795-1891), Jonathan Swift (1667-1745), Samuel Taylor Coleridge (1772-1832), Henry Fielding (1707-1754) and Algernon Charles Swinburne (1837-1909). 'My three years were determined by the influence of a fourth year man named Adamson, whom I think I met at the chess club. He started to talk to me about English literature. For the first time I heard the name Shelley. Wie gesagt, so gethan. Nothing else seemed to me worth while but a thorough reading of the great minds of the past. I bought all the classical authors. Whenever I found a reference of one to another I hastened to order his works. I spent the whole of my time in reading. It was very rare that I got to bed before daylight. But I had a horror of being thought a ''smug''; and what I was doing was a secret from my nearest friends. Whenever they were about I was playing chess and cards. In the daytime I went canoeing or cycling. I had no occupations which brought me into close touch with any great body of undergraduates. I even gave up the habit of going round to see people, though I was always at home to anyone who chose to call. I was not interested in the average man; I cultivated the freak. It was not that I liked abnormal people, it was simply the scientific attitude that it is from the abnormal that we learn.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 110]
The man named 'Adamson' was surely Henry Anthony Adamson (1871-1941) whom Crowley would have looked up to. Adamson went up to Trinity College to study mathematics in 1889, receiving his B.A. in 1892 and his M.A. in 1896. In his obituary he was described as a 'powerful mathematician and a brilliant chess problem analyst' by T. R. Dawson in the British Chess Magazine.
Crowley liked to see himself as a Romantic hero and tended to think of himself as a separate entity away from humanity, this would of course have been due to his strict and insular up-bringing in the Plymouth Brethren - 'I have always had a passionate yearning for mankind, wholesale and retail, but I cannot endure to have them anywhere around.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 110]
During the vacations at University he liked to wander among the English fells of the Lake District or travel to Northern Europe: Holland, Denmark, Norway and Sweden. During the long vacation of 1897 he went to St Petersburg to learn Russian which would have been an essential language for him were he to go into the profession he was considering - the Diplomatic Service [he became ill in October 1897 and saw the 'futility of all human endevour' - he was experiencing the 'trance of sorrow' and awakening to the spiritual realisation that he was to devote his life to the attainments of magic; he soon set himself upon a course to seek evidence of 'spiritual beings' through direct contact]. In the Easter vacation of 1898 he went to Wastdale Head in Cumbria with his friend and lover Herbert Charles Jerome Pollitt (1872-1942). In the summer vacations of 1896 and 1897 he went climbing in the Alps.
During his first year at Trinity Crowley was not best pleased to find that Hall was at eight thirty in the evening - 'I objected to my evenings being cut into by dining so late and soon acquired the habit of having all meals sent in from the kitchen. I was thus almost totally dissociated from the corporate life of the college.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 109]
Crowley stayed at 16 St John's Street until 1897.
'The atmosphere of Cambridge formed an admirable
background for my state of mind.'
[Confessions. P. 108]
Crowley began writing poetry around 1885 at the age of ten. The poems he wrote from 1885-1895 he considered his 'juvenilia' and these were later destroyed by him. It was not until he entered the Great Gate of Trinity that he saw himself as crossing a threshold in his poetry and entered his mature period. Today, his poetry is little read and only then by those who have a fascination for the man and the magician; his style is that of the romantic Shelley, the satanic Baudelaire and the earthy 'scandalous' Swinburne.
While Crowley was an undergraduate he contributed his poems to various periodicals such as ‘The Cambridge Magazine’, ‘The Granta’, ‘Cantab’ and ‘The Silver Crescent’. Some of the poems [of which many were re-published in 1904 in Crowley’s ‘In Residence: The Don’s Guide to Cambridge’ dedicated to his good friend Ivor Gordon Back (1873-1959)] show his early influences and his inventive and intellectual use of rhyming schemes. Some of the poems he contributed are: ‘Ballade of Bad Verses’ [Granta. Vol II, number 233. 30th April 1898], ‘Ballade of Whist’ [Cambridge Magazine. Vol 1, number 3. 11th May 1898], ‘Ballade of New Criticism’ [Cambridge Magazine. Vol 1, number 4. 18th May 1899], ‘Ballade of Ursa and Ursula’ [Cambridge Magazine. Vol 1, number 1. 1899], ‘Ballade of Summer Joys’ [Cambridge Magazine. Vol 1, number 6. 1st June 1899], ‘Ballade of the Mutability of Human Affairs’ [Granta. Vol 11, number 223. 26th February 1898], ‘A Refrain of a Far Country’ [Cambridge Magazine. Vol 1, number 1. 27th April 1899] and ‘A Sonnet of Spring Fashions’ [Granta. Vol 11, number 236. 21st May 1898]. Other works not included in Crowley’s ‘In Residence’ are: ‘The Ballad of Burdens’ [Granta. Vol 13. 3rd February 1899], ‘The Siegfried Finale’ [Cambridge Magazine. Vol 1, number 2. 1899] and ‘An Appeal to the American Republic’ [Cambridge Magazine. 1899].
O smug! in your desolate room,
Whatever’s the matter with you?
Your face is a picture of gloom,
Your pulse is a hundred and two,
Your eyelids are glued as with glue,
A towel is tied to your head,
You might be a man with the Flu!
‘’The Trip! and I wish I were dead!’’
[Ballade of Tripos Fever]
Tennis and cricket have come to stay,
Five o’clock is the time to bring
Tea and strawberry ice, and play
Various dulcet jargoning;
Lazy paddle all day to swing,
Lazy pipe to kill ennui’s germ,
Lazy, lazy everything: -
Sing heigh-ho for the glad May Term.
O hooray! merry boys, hooray!
Flannels are pleasures that have no sting.
Everyone’s white and cool and gay;
Everyone looks as if a wing
Might any moment sprout and spring,
Turning him into an ‘’alb’inerm’
Angelum’’, like Aladdin’s ring;
Sing heigh-ho for the glad May Term.
O the trees are out to-day!
O the buds are blossoming!
O the snow and the wind are away!
O the sun of the late sweet spring!
O the birds that are glad to sing
After the meal on the early worm!
O I am happier now than a king!
Sing heigh-ho for the glad May Term.
Envoi
Prince, or pauper, be what you may,
Business is quiet, but stocks are firm;
Never believe in the ‘’bears’’ in May!
Sing heigh-ho for the glad May Term.
[Ballade of the May Term]
Wild briar’s a blossom that fades;
The lily as easily dies;
And the love of terrestrial maids
Is tender, too tender to prize.
In a minute it droops and it dies,
And happiness spills at the brink;
Love opens the window and flies: -
But Smith’s is a permanent ink.
Prosperity favoureth trades.
An hour, and then troubles arise.
The workers drop axes and spades,
And Brandenburg labour supplies
The goods. It is very unwise
Your money in labour to sink.
It will vanish, the blue in the skies: -
But Smith’s is a permanent ink.
And even the woe that invades
Will pass, I make bold to surmise,
Like a man who for salmon trout wades
Till the water comes over his thighs.
He’s wet, but he speedily dries,
More quickly than pessimists think,
His gaff he repeatedly plies: -
But Smith’s is a permanent ink.
Envoi
Prince, we sell it in various shades,
In azure and purple and pink.
Things change by perceptible grades: -
But Smith’s is a permanent ink.
[Ballade of the Mutability of Human Affairs]
In May one often sees a fool
(A fool one guesses him to be)
Canoeing up to Byron’s Pool,
Or downward toward the salty sea.
One of them necessarily,
Unless one absolutely slacks
(Say under King’s or Trinity)
Upon the backs – upon the backs.
The garb this person wears is cool,
As his own self-complacency.
He wears a blazer made of wool
Or flannel (This is poetry,
And tailoring is nought to me)
Whose colours might be filed in stacks;
A straw in speechless harmony!
Upon the backs – upon the backs.
He smokes the weed of Istamboul;
He vaguely feels that he is free.
He seems to challenge Nature: ‘’who’ll
Dare to constrain my liberty?’’
He paddles like a honey-bee;
His golden boots are made at Fleck’s;
You often see a man like he
Upon the backs – upon the backs.
Envoi
Prince, you may storm Sevastopool,
With Maxim’s thwacks and axe attacks;
I ply the deft Canadian tool
Upon the backs – upon the backs.
[Ballade of the Backs]
In 1898, his final year at university, Crowley published one-hundred copies of his first collection of poetry:
ACELDAMA
A PLACE TO BURY STRANGERS
by
a gentleman of the University of Cambridge
privately printed
1898
Crowley borrowed from Shelley's 'The Necessity of Atheism' published in 1811 by a 'Gentleman of the University of Oxford'. The poem created little success and was read among student circles and even Crowley thought of it as a transitionary poem between his juvenilia and his mature period. Not long after appeared further publications of his poetry: 'The Tale of Archais' which Crowley considered his first real successful poem; 'Songs of the Spirit', 'Green Alps' which was never published; 'The Poem', 'Jezebel', 'Jephthah' and the extremely pornographic 'White Stains'.
Today 16 St John's Street is a Jewellers and its 18th Century architecture has remained mostly the same. In 1879 it was according to records inhabited by Mrs Harriet Colman, a music seller and in 1883 it is 'Colman & Co'. It has also been used by a firm of tailors and robe makers called 'Maltby'.
'Till the Great Gate of Trinity opened me the way to freedom I had always been obsessed more or less either by physical weakness or the incubus of adolescence. I had never known what it was to be able to work freely and gladly. Now, however, I was able to give myself with absolute concentration to literature and I read everything important in the language with the utmost thoroughness.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 114]
WHEAT AND WINE
Clear, deep, and blue, the sky
Is silvered by the morn,
And where the dewdrop's eye
Catches its brilliancy
Strange lights and hues are born:
I have seen twelve colours hover on a single
spray of thorn.
There is a great grey tower
Cut clear against the deep;
In the sun's wakening hour
I think it has the power
To touch the soul of sleep
With its tender thought, and bid me to awake
for joy - and weep.
This night I am earlier.
No drowsy thoughts drew nigh
At eve to make demur
That I be minister
To Cynthia maidenly:
All night I have watched her sail through a
black and silver sky.
Within my soul there fight
Two full and urgent streams,
Work's woe and dream's delight:
Like snow and sun they smite,
Days battle hard with dreams:
On a world of misty beauty the Aurora
clearly beams.
So labour fought with pride,
And love with idleness,
My soul was torn and tried
With the impassioned tide
Of storm and deathly stress -
I had never dreamed a lily should arise amid
the press.
Yet such a flower sprang here
Within this soul of mine,
When foemen bade good cheer
To foemen, grew one clear
Concept, ideal, divine,
Of a god of light and laughter, of a god of
wheat and wine.
Work on, strong mind, devise
The outer life aright!
Dream, subtle soul, and arise
To noblest litanies
That pierce the mask of night -
In a man work lifts his eyelids, but his dreams
lend eyes their light.
So dreams and days are wed,
And soul and body lie
Ambrosial in Love's bed.
See, heaven with stars is spread -
So glad of life am
I
If an angel came to call me I am sure I
would not die.
[The poem was written during his time at 16 St John's Street and the 'great grey tower' is St John's chapel which Crowley would have seen from his rooms. It was Crowley's 'habit to work from midnight to dawn, when he could no longer be disturbed by visits from friends.' From 'Songs of the Spirit' in The Collected Works of Aleister Crowley - volume I]
35 Sidney Street is an early 19th Century, three story building with cellars. In 1879 it was the office of 'Lincolne & Lofts' manufacturers of Loft's patent bottle washing & rinsing machine. The shop front belonged to 'Lincolne & Son' grocers, Italian warehousemen, ale and porter merchants, agents for W & A Gilbey, wine and spirit merchants and 'Ridgeways & Co's Teas & Coffees'. Crowley lived here from 1897 to January 1898.
'I found myself, from the very beginning of my university career, urged by circumstances of every sort to indulge my passion in every way but the right one. My ill-health had prevented me from taking part in the ordinary amusements of the public school boy. My skill in avoiding corporal punishment and my lack of opportunity for inflicting it had saved me from developing the sadistic or masochistic sides of my character. But at Cambridge I discovered that I was of an intensely passionate nature, physiologically speaking. My poetic instincts, further, transformed the most sordid liaisons into romance, so that the impossibility of contracting a suitable and serious relation did not worry me. I found, moreover, that any sort of satisfaction acted as a powerful spiritual stimulus. Every adventure was the direct cause of my writing poetry. In the periods of suppression my brain had been completely clogged; I was as incapable of thought of any kind as if I had had the toothache.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 113]
Once the 'Turk's Head' coffee house, one of the earliest coffee houses in the country, 14 Trinity Street with its 16th Century architectural features was much favoured by undergraduates. It is timber-framed and plastered in two gabled bays with projecting upper floors and projecting gables with finials; bay windows on both upper floors. The bays are divided by small pendant columns with carved brackets. Most of the external carving has been restored. It has a tiled roof and was Grade II listed in 1950. The upper floors were once the 'Turk's Head Carvery'. In 1878 this beautiful Tudor building was a Bank 'Foster & Co' which was founded by the Foster brothers, Richard and Ebenezer. The bank later moved to Sidney Street, opposite Petty Cury.
In 1913 it is 'The Cafe' serving 'Luncheons and Teas, cakes & fancies of every description for Afternoon Teas'. During the nineteen-twenties it was 'Matthew's Cafe'. There is a blocked doorway on the left of the entrance which still has an original bell marked 'press'.
Crowley moved into rooms at 14 Trinity Street in January 1898 and his lover Herbert Charles Jerome Pollitt (1872-1942) whom Crowley met in October 1897 would often visit him at this address. John Symonds gives us a description of Crowley and his elegant rooms at Trinity: 'he had taken to wearing pure silk shirts and great floppy bow-knotted ties; on his fingers were rings of semi-precious stones. An atmosphere of luxury, studiousness and harsh effort pervaded his rooms at Cambridge. Books covered the walls to the ceiling and filled four revolving walnut bookcases. They were largely on science and philosophy, with a modest collection of Greek and Latin classics, and a sprinkling of French and Russian novels. On one shelf shone the black and gold of The Arabian Nights of Richard Burton; below was the flat canvas and square label of the Kelmscott Chaucer. Valuable first editions of the British poets stood beside extravagantly bound volumes issued by Isidor Liseux. Over the door hung an ice-axe with worn-down spike and ragged shaft, and in the corner was a canvas bag containing a salmon rod. Leaded Staunton chessmen were in their mahogany box upon a card-table scattered with poker chips.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 15].
Some of the books Crowley would have been reading are works by: Immanuel Kant (1724-1804), Herbert Spencer (1820-1903), David Hume (1711-1776), Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895), Francois Rabelais (1494-1553) and Rudyard Kipling (1865-1936). Many of these books he would have purchased from Deighton Bell & Co which was located at 13 Trinity Street. It was here where he bought Arthur Edward Waite's 'The Book of Black Magic and of Pacts'. In fact, there were several bookshops on Trinity Street such as: Macmillan's at number 1 Trinity Street, Metcalfe's at number 12 Trinity Street, Rivington's at number 19 and William Tomlin at number 24 Trinity Street. Crowley came into his inheritance upon reaching the age of twenty-one [Monday 12th October 1896] and figures often quoted are forty to fifty thousand pounds which was a huge amount at the time!
Numbers 35, 36 and 37 were built at the same time, dated 1861 on the stairhead gable and 1894 on the central gable. Red brick with stone dressing, three storeys and attics. There is a modern shop front entrance to the chambers above between numbers 36 and 37. There are two windows each and a narrow staircase. The first floor has mullions and transoms and iron grilles to be windows. Six pedimented gable dormers, dated gable over stairhead. Slate mansard roof. In 1878 it was home to Richard Lord Clark, hosier. In 1892 it was a lodging house owned by George Sussum and in 1913 it was 'Robinson's Bicycle Showroom'.
This is probably the last address Crowley stayed at during his time at Cambridge. As to Crowley's examination results we know that he 'passed the second part of the general Examination in the Michaelmas Term 1896, the first part in Easter Term 1897 and took the special Examination in Chemistry in the Michaelmas term, 1897, obtaining a second class. He did not graduate.' [The Magical Dilemma of Victor Neuburg. Jean Overton Fuller. 1965. P. 130]
BY THE CAM
Twilight is over, and the noon of night
Draws to its zenith. Here beyond the stream
Dance the wild witches that dispel my dream
Of gardens naked in Diana's sight.
Foul censers, altars desecrated, blight
The corpse-lit river, whose dank vapours teem
Heavy and horrible, a deadly steam
Of murder's black intolerable might.
The stagnant pools rejoice; the human feast
Revels at height; the sacrament is come;
God wakes no lightning in the broken East;
His awful thunders listen and are dumb;
Earth gapes not for that sin; the skies renew
At break of day their vestiture of blue.
[From 'Songs of the Spirit' in The Collected
Works of Aleister Crowley - volume I]
The original Garret Hostel Bridge (not the modern 1960’s bridge) built in 1837 is a place that the solitary Crowley would have known as he enjoyed walking over the bridge and looking at the Cam while he contemplated poetry and philosophy.
ON GARRET HOSTEL BRIDGE
Here in the evening curl white mists and wreathe in their vapour
All the gray spires of stone, all the immobile towers;
Here in the twilight gloom dim trees and sleeping rivers,
Here where the bridge is thrown over the amber stream.
Chill is the ray that steals from the moon to the stream that whispers
Secret tales of its source, songs of its fountain-head.
Here do I stand in the dusk; like spectres mournfully moving
Wisps of the cloud-wreaths form, dissipate into the mist,
Wrap me in shrouds of gray, chill me and make me shiver,
Not with the Night alone, not with the sound of her wing,
Yet with a sense of something vague and unearthly stalking
(Step after step as I move) me, to annul me, quell
Hope and desire and life, bid light die under my eyelids,
Bid the strong heart despair, quench the desire of
Heaven.
So I shudder a little; and my heart goes out to the mountain,
Rock upon rock for a crown, snow like an ermine robe;
Thunder and lightning free fashioned for speech and seeing,
Pinnacles royal and steep, queen of the arduous breast!
Ye on whose icy bosom, passionate, at the sunrise,
Ye in whose wind-swept hollows, lulled in the moonrise clear,
Often and oft I struggled, a child with an angry mother,
Often and oft I slept, maid in a lover's arms.
Back to ye, back, wild towers, from this flat and desolate fenland,
Back to ye yet will I flee, swallow on wing to the south;
Move in your purple cloud-banks and leap your fast-swelling torrents,
Bathe in the pools below, laugh with the winds above,
Battle and strive and climb in the teeth of the glad wild weather,
Flash on the slopes of ice, dance on the spires of rock,
Run like a glad young panther over the stony high-lands,
Shout with the joy of living, race to the rugged cairn,
Feel the breath of your freedom burn in my veins, and Freedom!
Freedom! echoes adown cliff and precipitous ghyll.
Down by the cold gray lake the sun descends from his hunting,
Shadow and silence steals over the frozen fells.
Oh, to be there, my heart! And the vesper bells awaken;
Colleges call their children; Lakeland fades from the sight.
Only the sad slow Cam like a sire with age grown heavy
Wearily moves to the sea, to quicken to life at last.
Blithelier I depart, to a sea of sunnier kindness;
Hours of waiting are past; I re-quicken to love.
[From 'Mysteries: Lyrical and Dramatic' in The
Collected Works of Aleister Crowley - volume I]
Collected Works of Aleister Crowley - volume I]
Trinity College was founded by Henry VIII in 1546. The King's statue looks down from the Great Gate and his right hand, which once held a sceptre, now holds a chair leg, the result of a student prank long ago!
'I had the sensation of drawing a long deep breath as one does after swimming under water or [an even better analogy] as one does after bracing oneself against the pain inflicted by a dentist. I could not imagine anything better in life. I found myself suddenly in an entirely new world. I was part of the glories of the past; and I resolved to be one of the glories of the future.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 107] Crowley then goes on to say 'I should like the haunted room over the Great Gate of Trinity to be turned into a vault like that of Christian Rosencreutz to receive my sarcophagus. I must admit that I don't know of much else in England of the works of man which I would not make haste to destroy if the opportunity occurred. But Trinity, except New Court and Whewell's Court, is enough for any poet to live and die for.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 107]
Legend has it that Byron bathed naked in the fountain with his pet bear as students were forbidden to keep dogs!
Although Crowley did not have much contact with the day to day life of the university he was a member of a few clubs associated with colleges such as the debating society known as The Magpie and Stump (Crowley participated in a few discussions of a rather frivolous nature and delighted in making witty quips); the Boat Club, which he found to be of little use to him, and the Cambridge University Chess Club of which he was President in his second year (1896). In fact, Crowley made an intense study of the game of chess, already being a more than talented amateur and would study for more than two hours a day and spend even more time than that in actual practice. He became a formidable opponent and was on the way to become a leading light in the world of chess - a 'chess master!'
In bringing to life Crowley's days at Cambridge we cannot completely rely on what he has dictated more than twenty years later under the influence of heroin in his masterpiece of autobiography or 'autohagiography' as he termed it - 'The Confessions of Aleister Crowley' first published by the Mandrake Press in 1929. Crowley, like everyone else would see the actions of his past in a different light and there is a tendency to romanticise the younger image of himself. But it paints the greatest picture of the young poet and we see a man on the threshold of securing his future and the immortality of his name!
IN NEVILLE'S COURT,
TRINITY COLLEGE,
CAMBRIDGE.
I think the souls of many men are here
Among these cloisters, underneath the spire
That the moon silvers with magnetic fire;
But not a moon-ray is it, that so clear
Shines on the pavement, for a voice of fear
It hath, unless it be the breeze that mocks
My ear, and waves his old majestic locks
About his head. There fell upon my ear:
''O soul contemplative of distant things,
Who hast a poet's heart, even if thy pen
Be dry and barren, who dost hold Love dear,
Speed forth this message on the fiery wings
Of stinging song to all the race of men:
That they have hope; for we are happy here.''
[The voice is that of Lord Tennyson whose rooms were in Neville's court. From 'Songs of the Spirit' in The Collected Works of Aleister Crowley - volume I]
'Christianity was the official religion with which it was convenient to comply, just as it is convenient to go to a good tailor.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P 108]
Crowley would not fall in line with College's routines if they were opposed to his own will and natural order; he would not be interfered with: 'When I discovered that chapel was compulsory I immediately struck back. The junior dean halled me for not attending chapel, which I was certainly not going to do, because it involved early rising. I excused myself on the ground that I had been brought up among the Plymouth Brethren. The dean asked me to come and see him occasionally and discuss the matter, and I had the astonishing impudence to write to him that ''the seed planted by my father, watered by my mother's tears, would prove too hardy a growth to be uprooted even by his eloquence and learning''. It sounds like the most despicable hypocrisy, but it was pretty good cheek, and I had made up my mind that I would not be interfered with. I regarded any attempt to control my actions as an impertinent intrusion and I was not going to waste time in taking any but the easiest way out.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 108]
Crowley remained at Trinity College until the Easter Term of 1898. After he left he still kept in contact with certain like-minded undergraduates. 'As Crowley was a former student of Trinity it was perfectly in order for him to visit his old college and to walk up any of the staircases.' [General J F C Fuller in Jean Overton Fuller's 'The Magical Dilemma of Victor Neuburg'. 1965. P. 143] It was in this way that he me the young poet who would become his magical assistant Victor Benjamin Neuburg (1883-1940). Victor went up to Trinity College, Cambridge in the Michaelmas Term (October) of 1906 aged twenty-three. He took the Tripos in Modern Languages and passed his examinations gaining a third class Honours degree. He was in residence at Trinity until the Easter Term of 1909.
'Crowley, though he had a sentiment for his old university and habitually came to it to recruit for his Order - Mudd, Pinsent, Merton and Gerald Yorke, were all Cambridge men - did not regard degrees.' [The Magical Dilemma of Victor Neuburg. Jean Overton Fuller. 1965. P. 147]
'Mudd' is Norman Mudd M.A. (1889-1934) of Trinity College, Cambridge. He entered Trinity in July 1907 on a mathematics scholarship, remaining until 1910. He was secretary of the Cambridge University Freethought Association where he knew Victor Neuburg (1883-1940). He became Professor of Applied Mathematics at Grey University College, Bloemfontein, South Africa. Mudd [Frater Omnia Pro Veritate] assisted Crowley at the Abbey of Thelema in 1923 and sadly took his own life in 1934. 'Pinsent' is Gerald Hume Pinsent (1888-1976) who took mathematics at Trinity College, Cambridge. 'Merton' is Wilfred Merton (1888-1957), engraver and printer. Gerald Joseph Yorke (1901-1983) of Trinity College, Cambridge. English cricketer and Major in the British Army. Yorke became a member of Crowley's magical order.
'Like Byron, Shelley, Swinburne and Tennyson, I left the university without taking a degree. It has been better so; I have accepted no honour from her; she has had much from me.' [The Confessions of Aleister Crowley. P. 166]
Isis Blossom
Vast, that starry abode of love,
Is an empire ruled by man's intrusion.
The ache of falsehood from above
Is death's complexion and delusion.
Captivated by Orion's pains,
This pyramid sealed, the corpse fiend fled
Into the darkness that contains
The Isis blossom and the dead;
Where Nephthy's black robe was blown wide
To reveal her ruby kiss of gold.
Yet sphinx-filled madness, there had died
In the ceremonies of old.
Tura - na ab - k am (1)
These lips are sweet and delicately veiled,
Crowned by a flaming diadem;
Where the new moon to the full moon sailed
Beyond the midnight khunt of Khem;
Beyond the shroud and the scarlet caress
Into the silence of the tomb, so deep,
To kiss the serpent-sighing darkness
And the gonging beat of man in sleep.
And in mourning the beloved...come, O come!
For here great sadness lies before
For here great sadness lies before
These cursed lips that hath been knocked dumb,
For Thou art the Goddess I adore!
Henen - a em Amsu.
Auf - a Net. (2)
The rose of antiquity hath broke its stem,
And its scented glory hath all but given
Its blood to the ceremonial khunt of Khem
To shineth in the mask of Osiris risen.
And beneath the death-filled mercurial sky
The pyramid of Royal blood hath ran,
As the oracle crumbled with a sigh
To see the slain God's nemess fall on man!
A Anset. (3)
Barry Van-Asten
Notes:
1. I have purified myself and my heart is filled with joy.
2. Male: My phallus is that of Amsu. Female: My flesh is of Net.
3. Hail Isis.
NOTES UPON A CEREMONIAL INVOCATION OF Παν
By AUDRAREP
By AUDRAREP
Ceremonial sequence:
1. Imprecation, as of a slave unto a Lord (awe).
2. Oath, as of a vassal to a liege (fealty).
3. Memorial, as of a child to a parent (dependence).
4. Orisen, as of a priest to a God (adoration).
5. Colloquy, as of a brother unto a brother (confidence).
6. Conjuration, as of a friend to a friend (comradeship).
7. Madrigal, as of a lover to a lover (passion).
Instruments: The Wand and the Cup.
a. Prayer to the God, commemorating His physical attributes.
b. The Voice of the God speaks (visualisation of the God-form). The Voice is heard and echoed by the magician.
c. The identity of the magician with the God (a conscious loss of being), its conclusion is a return to consciousness.
d. The God invoked, as if by that God Himself (His will to manifest in the magician). The God has heard the distant cry of the magician). The conclusion of this is the original object stated.
Some examples of the words spoken:
a. ‘Thee, thee I invoke, O mighty majesty of Παν’.
b. ‘Behold! I am Παν!’
c. ‘Behold! He is in me, and I am in Him... therefore do all things obey my word!’
d. ‘Therefore do thou come forth unto me’.
THE FORMULA OF HORUS AND HARPOCRATES
THE REVERBERATING FORMULA
a. Yod (Fire) – Active (Horus). The magician’s will addresses the God.
b. He (Water) – Passive (H.P.K.). The God addresses the universe.
c. Vau (Air) – Active/Passive (Horus/H.P.K.). Fire and Water conjoined, the God and the magician are as one.
d. He (Earth) – Passive (H.P.K.). Silence, the God speaks.
AN OUTLINE FOR A RITUAL
I. Consecration – Circle. Banishing – The Ritual of the Star Ruby.
Oath (1) – The grade sign and giving the purpose of the ritual.
Oath (2) – Before the Lord of the Universe.
Strike Bell x1.
II. The Confession.
The oath renewed.
Light incense.
III. Invocation – (the assumption of God-form in the sign of Παν)
Recite ‘The Hymn to Pan’.
[assumption of God-forms: Horus and Harpocrates].
IV. The Devotion – standing in the God-form (not H.P.K. but Παν), reflect upon the forms of Love for the deity, while repeating the mantra:
‘Καιρε Σωτη Κοσμου, Ιω Παν, Ιω Παν.’
V. The Climax.
The magical dance, giving the signs of L.V.X. while reciting:
ΙΩ ΙΩ ΙΩ ΙΑΩ ΣΑΒΑΟ ΚΥΡΙΗ ΑΒΡΑΣΑΧ ΚΥΡΙΗ ΜΕΙΘΡΑΣ ΚΥΡΙΗ ΦΑΛΛΗ. ΙΩ ΠΑΝ, ΙΩ ΠΑΝ ΠΑΝ ΙΩ ΙΣΧΥΡΟΣ, ΙΩ ΑΘΑΝΑΤΟΝ ΙΩ ΑΒΡΟΤΟΝ ΙΩ ΙΑΩ. ΧΑΙΡΕ ΦΑΛΛΗ ΧΑΙΡΕ ΠΑΝΦΑΓΗ ΧΑΙΡΕ ΠΑΝΓΕΝΕΤΟΡ. ΑΓΙΟΣ, ΑΓΙΟΣ, ΑΓΙΟΣ ΙΑΩ.
[From the ceremony of the opening of the veil ‘Liber XV Ecclesiae Gnosticae Catholicae Canon Missae. ‘IO IO IO SABAO, Lord ABRASAX, Lord MITHRAS, Lord PHALLUS. IO PAN, IO PAN PAN, IO powerful, IO deathless, IO woundless, IO IAO. Hail PHALLUS, hail all-devourer, hail father of all. Holy, Holy, Holy IAO.’]
General notes on Numerical Correspondences:
Παν is represented in the Tarot by the card XV The Devil. The letter Ayin (eye) which is 70 and Capricorn, creative energy. The Devil card triumphs in androgynous and bisexual energy and Ayin is the secret eye of the Phallus: ΦΑΛΛΟς = 831.
ΠΑΝΦΑΓΗ (Panphage) All-devourer – ΠΑΝΓΕΝΕΤΟΡ (Pangenetor) All-begetter.
PAN is ALL.
ΙΩ = 10+70=80
ΠΑΝ = 80+1+50= 131
80+131=211.
IO= I, the Lingam (Phallus) the Sun. Yod. O, the Yoni (Kteis) the Moon. Ayin.
Ph (Pe) [Phallus]= 80
K (Kaph) [kteis]= 20
80+20=100
IO PAN=211 (211-100=111=Aleph (an oxe) and the link to the Pentagram and Hadit. Pan is also an aspect of the Fool in the Tarot whose number is O (letter Aleph).
Binah on the Tree of Life= the Night of Pan and there is also a link to Baphomet, which is Hod on the Tree of Life.
131 (Pan) + 25= 156 which is Babalon. (25 is the square of 5, the Pentagram and the symbol of Hadit; the squaring of the circle by ALHIM. 5= He, the letter of Aries).
I=IX in the Tarot (Hermit).
O=XV in the Tarot (Devil).
P=XVI in the Tarot (Blasted Tower). The letter of Mars.
A=O in the Tarot (Fool). The Pentagram, energy.
N=XIII in the Tarot (Death).
Further:
O! Is the trinity which resides in the Night of Pan above the Abyss which is NOX: Death, Kteis and the sign of the Phallus. NOX=210 (note IO PAN=211). See Liber VII, Chapter I.
O!= Nuit – Hadit – Ra-Hoor-Khuit. [Kteis – phallus – Sperma]
For instruction upon devotion see Liber Astarte vel Berylli sub figura CLXXV given in Appendix vii of Magick in Theory and Practice. And for the tables of correspondences see Liber 777.
THE
WAND OF SILENCE
Excerpts from the Magickal
Diaries
Of AUDRAREP
PART ONE
There is no very sharp distinction
between the two branches of
the Art. It cannot be said, even,
that black Magic is invariably and White Magic occasionally evil.
The Book of Ceremonial Magic. A.E.
Waite. 1911.
Do what thou wilt shall be the
whole of the law
It was in the year of 1988, on Saturday 19th November that I received into
my hands Aleister Crowley’s ‘Magick in Theory and Practice’, and for me it
confirmed many such ‘theories’ that I had long believed. The book hinted at
worlds I had long known existed and dimensions I knew to be beyond the veil.
The book contained energy of its own and to hold it in my hands I felt it surge
through me. I had never felt that with any other book or object before. I
regarded the book with a religious awe, the kind one would feel towards a Holy
Book of scriptures and for me this was a ‘Holy Book’ of great distinction. It
seemed to be a key both literally and in a way that spoke of chemical, astral,
physical and spiritual changes. It unlocked for me a system that I wanted to
understand more and to be able to control. It took some time before I could
feel I truly ‘possessed’ the book in the physical sense as it had such a strong
force of its own existence. I pored over it and practically lived within its
pages. Many years later, when times were hard and I needed to eat, I was forced
to sell my whole book collection on Crowley, including a full set of The
Equinox, yet I chose to ‘sacrifice’ the book (Magick) rather than let another
hand hold its pages! But for now, the book was my constant companion.
Something of a ‘magical nature’ must have occurred on the night of Thursday
6th July 1989 because the following day I wrote that ‘the night had been cruel’
which I take to mean there was some spiritual struggle within me; a ‘night of
the soul’ and I wrote the words ‘Do What Thou Wilt’. It is the first time the
words occur and I take it as a definite declaration that my course had been set
and this night, whatever really happened, had shown me the way forward on this
journey.
In January 1991 I had been attempting various experiments from Magick, such
as Asana (1) and Pranayama (2). I also used the Tatwas (3). In May I was
throwing myself into an almost daily routine, which included reading Magick and
Mystical Yoga exercises. On Wednesday 3rd of July I began reading Colin
Wilson’s ‘The Nature of the Beast’ and on Saturday 6th of July I recorded a
breakthrough in my diary! In my asana I explored the aethyr of Air (4). After a
while I felt the presence of a male figure. His skin was blue and his head was
bald. I was told he was the elemental King of the Sylphs (5). On the Saturday
morning I had a dream in which I walked a vast city, in pursuit of someone and
there were lots of small dogs. After this, on Monday 8th July I record that
‘ASNIA’ (6) was formed this week. I remember it was a very intense week which
was filled by moments of Kundalini (7). The ASNIA is that part of my nature
which belongs to the sexual dimension of the Great Work which resides in my
being. It is an expression of Pan and the Greek Gods and also of Venus. By
Wednesday the 10th I had reached an internal frenzy and I had immersed myself
in witchcraft. I was continuing the daily meditations which I see now was not
as structured as it should have been, but I was alone and climbing this peak by
myself, any damn way I could!
On Tuesday 16th of July I purchased ‘Liber Al vel Legis’, The Book of the
Law (8) and I began to read! It was such a revelation and an awakening to me!
By the following Thursday 18th I was once again in the grip of a constant state
of Kundalini! It was much stronger than before and burst upon me like a
gigantic wave of energy. By Monday the Kundalini had subsided and the intense
active energy had ended! But it was a revelation to me both spiritually and
sexually; I had always assumed a link between physical energy and
magickal/spiritual energy, and I had glimpsed its awful power! Throughout
August I was reading Magick and Liber Legis daily. On Saturday 17th of August I
had a vision of a naked man with golden skin sitting on top of a mountain,
looking out. It was hot, the sky was blue and the man had his back toward me.
In the following year I decided to continue my magickal studies very
seriously and all magickal workings were shown in the diary for 1992 by the
sign of the sun and moon conjoined. It is a year in which my magickal persona
dawns; and it marks ‘the end of the brute, and the birth of an adept!’
On Saturday 18th of January I bought Crowley’s ‘Confessions’ and began to
read it with complete fascination. The book, along with Magick became my
guiding light. By Friday 24th I had recorded this in my diary:
4. a.m. Asana: legs crossed and held in the air. I focused on a red
triangle and felt myself fall into the darkness by a spiral motion. My eyes
suddenly became illuminated. I thought I had accidentally opened them and had
to check they were still closed, which they were. I saw myself lying on the bed
wearing colourful cheque tweed trousers. Then a head appeared at the end of the
bed, in silhouette, descending quietly. There was no time and no space, but I felt
that hours had passed in the interval. On opening my eyes I checked the time
with my torch and saw it was 4.10 am. I had pierced the veil!
On Tuesday 28th I bought ‘777 & other Qabalistic Writings of Aleister
Crowley’, and by Sunday 2nd of February I made reference to the Ritual of
Abramelin (9) in the diary as something I must aspire towards! It was a
declaration, of a rudimentary sort which showed my determination. On Monday
24th I wrote ‘Asnia and Asnya are now established’. It is strange to look back
at this statement for it seems as if I were a child attempting to carry
electricity in a bucket!
I wrote to Mandrake Press and the Sorcerer’s Apprentice on Monday 6th of
April for catalogues of books they have in stock. I observed the Holy Days of
8, 9 and 10th of April, reading Liber Legis accordingly. I received the
Mandrake catalogue on the 8th and the Sorcerer’s Apprentice on the 10th. On
Sunday 12th I got into my asana (right leg crossed over left) and opened the
chakras (10). I focused on a violet triangle suspended at my third eye and used
an expansion and contraction method which I discovered for myself and found it
worked well. It lasted for 30 minutes and the position was very cramped. For
some reason during the early hours my ‘locked’ door opened and I repeated the
experiment on Saturday 18th at 2.35 a.m. I found it extremely painful and I
managed 25 minutes. On Monday 11th of May I received ‘The Book of Lies’ and
‘Diary of a Drug Fiend’ from Mandrake Press, which I began to read. On
Wednesday 13th I finished Book of Lies and began Drug Fiend (which I finished
on Saturday 23rd). In my asana, using the expansion and contraction method,
combined with fingers locked in mudra (11), I saw this appear on a piece of
paper before me:
TIME O
ASANA
DHARANA etc.
I saw Crowley’s eyes appear to me and the words ‘Hong Kong’ and ‘Marriage’.
On Monday 1st of June I was reading Huxley’s ‘Doors of Perception’ and on
Wednesday 24th I received Crowley’s ‘Eight Lectures on Yoga’ and ‘AHA’. From
the following day I perform my asana every night/morning. By Monday 6th of July
I had decided upon a probationary name: Nosce te Ipsom (know thyself), but I
was still not ready to take that step. By Friday I received books on Crowley’s
‘Goetia’ and ‘Enochian Magic’ which I read avidly.
I was also experimenting with ‘invisibility’, not the conjuror’s trick but
the real ‘art’ and I had some success in this (and so did my brother it
appears!) We often found that people failed to observe us and would ordinarily
walk right through us if they didn’t see us at the last moment; this could
happen in a wide open space such as a park; with all the space to choose from
they would still plot a course which ran through where we would be. It was
strange and we could almost do this at will!
On Friday 31st after reading Appendix II of Magick I got into my asana (left
leg bent behind me, heel touching anus. Right leg stretched; hands on thighs).
I focused on the words: ‘I am breathing in… I am breathing out’. I used a
breathing cycle of Inhale for 5 and exhale for 10. This was a good rhythm.
After a time I began to recite my mantra: A.M.P.H. (Aum Mani Padme Hum) (12). I
noticed my hands became very numb; I felt they were still there but not
physically, as if in memory only. This feeling travelled all over my body and I
felt as if I were floating, evaporating into the cosmos. Still repeating the
mantra, things appeared, such as a city of pyramids, very black. There was no
pain at the end. Unfortunately I did not record the time. Asana and experiments
continued and by August and September I was reading Arthur Machen’s stories and
M.R. James’ ghost stories. On Monday 28th of September I received ‘The Book of
the Sacred Magic of Abramelin the Mage’ and Crowley’s ‘Heart of the Master’,
both from Mandrake. On Saturday 3rd of October I noted:
Asnia Soham Nocod Isro Adna:
Cursed, whom thy servants promise obedience!
The Magickal Word of the aeon personal to myself came to me at 11.10 a.m. on
Thursday 29th of October (the current) as three words in one: OOO
e.g. Hadit
ABRA HAD ABRA
Along with my asana practices I incorporated the Tatwas daily. On Friday 6th
I received Crowley’s ‘Mothers Tragedy’ and began reading his ‘Moonchild’ the
next day. On the 26th I was reading T.C. Lethbridge’s book on ‘ESP’, and so
another year passes.
Sweet Wizard, in whose footsteps I
have trod
Unto the shrine of the most obscene
god,
The Triumph of Pan. Victor Neuburg.
1910.
In the beginning of the year 1993, I noted in the diary that whenever I am
out I feel as if I am being watched and stared at, as if other people can see
something in me I am not aware of; I try to cover it by singing to myself,
laughing or humming which must make things appear worse. Also, and more
tiresome is the fact that my mind will not allow my body to turn to the left,
if so, I have to turn the opposite way as soon as I realise this. It is all to
do with the laws of equilibrium. If I enter on the left I exit by the left
also. As you can imagine, on a particularly ‘bad’ day a short journey can
become quite long, and often did so! I cannot make loops with my body motion,
therefore throughout any given day I am aware of the direction my body is
pointing and I can account for all my steps and even at the end of the day
reverse my progress to the point of waking. I have found this very useful in
the training of Magick, especially Ceremonial Magick.
It was on Thursday 4th of February that I received from Mandrake Press, ‘The
Golden Dawn’ by Israel Regardie. I was in a state of depression which had been
escalating for some time so it was a great sign to me! There had been a lot of
‘strange’ activity in the house: My brother had been complaining of seeing
‘misty shapes’ in his room and lights all over the house keep flickering. There
were strange noises in the mornings and often things would get misplaced or
moved around. But it was this day Thursday 4th of February and the following
day at 3.36 a.m. that I sought the truth. I pleaded with the Master of the
Aeon; I had an ordinary task to perform (on Thursday 4th) and I requested the
power of Invisibility, which was granted to me. I had received proof of the
efficacy of the Great Work and that is why I designated this day, Thursday the
4th of February, 1993 as the beginning of my Magickal Probation which will last
for one year; it is the first step toward Neophyte whereby I shall furnish the
Temple for the coming of the Light!
On Saturday 6th of February I was busy learning the first knowledge lecture
of the Golden Dawn and studying Hebrew. I began that night with exercises in
the ‘four-fold breath (13) and the tatwas. On Saturday 13th I recorded that I
had been studying pentagrams and geomancy and that a strange feeling descends
upon me, a sort of glow beginning at the head and descending but when I notice
it happening, it stops. I had been studying the various pentagrams and their
uses and the relationships with the tatwas etc, these I used in meditations. On
Wednesday 17th I began learning the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram
(14) and on Monday 1st of March I noted a ‘turning point’ where I performed the
Ritual astrally as opposed to physically, (this was actually at 2 a.m. on
Tuesday 2nd). As of Wednesday 3rd of March I performed the Lesser Banishing
Ritual (invoking) every morning physically and the Lesser Banishing Ritual
(banishing) every night physically. I would continue to do this without fail,
except for serious sickness throughout the year of probation.
On Thursday 11th of March I did a diagram to show the expansion and
contraction of the universe:
Forward backwards mirror image
BIRTH..............*......................BIRTH...........................*
On Wednesday 30th of October 1992 I received a phrase: ‘Backwards then
backwards again; backwards to the start then backwards to the end!’
On Monday 15th of March at 8.50 a.m. I received a vision, the likes of which
I had not received before. This would occur frequently from this day and
because of its intensity and quality of texture I called them ‘Fabric Visions’.
This first ‘fabric’ concerned horses being transferred from one field to
another; men wearing caps with rolled-up shirt sleeves. The vision was circa
1840 and I heard the place ‘Belfast’ mentioned. Later that day, I found myself
learning various forms of Magickal gestures! (15) I learnt the Golden Dawn 2nd
knowledge lecture on Monday 29th and Tuesday 30th of March. On Monday 5th I was
continuing with the 2nd knowledge lecture and on the next day my brother
complained of more noises in his room; at 3.45 a.m. he ran out the room after
some disturbance in which a ‘force’ threw something to the floor. My brother
and I have often seen the curious shifting light in that room as children, it
has a propulsion of its own, a living entity. I would guess that a death has
occurred in the upper rooms of the house in the past [this was later confirmed
as fact]. On the days of 8, 9, and 10th of April I observed the Holy Days by
reading Liber Legis and writing poetry. On Saturday the 10th I began the
beginnings of a formula which I would later return to:
ASNIA 1+60+50+10+1=122 (1+2+2=5)
ASNYA 1+60+50+10+1=122 (1+2+2=5)
ASNEA 1+60+50+5+1=126 (1+2+6=9)
ASNA 1+60+50+1=112 (1+1+2=4)
Amma Sobam Nocod Isro Adna [Ah-em-mah, So-bah-mee, Noh-koh-dah,
Ee-ess-roh, Ah-dah-nah. Ah-ess-nee-ah. ]
That night I got into my asana and used ‘abrahadabra’ (16) as my mantra.
This I would do each night after the Lesser Banishing Ritual, and also use the
tatwas. Here is an example:
Thursday 15th of April. After LBR (ban). 3.45 a.m. I invoke Spirit passive.
Asana: Thunderbolt position. Breathing: in 7, out 14. (20-30 minutes). Felt as
if my right hand disappeared, cramp set in left leg. Felt like the end of the
world, quiet and still. It was hard to fight the boredom which descended upon
me but I persevered. Before I finished I heard a sound outside my door, the
stairs creaked and a voice which seemed to cackle, lasted what I thought to be
a long time. Then all was quiet and it seemed easier to concentrate now; images
flooded my brain of a landscape, vast and limitless. I felt so insignificant. I
banished the Spirit passive.
On Monday 19th of April I received ‘Thelema’ from Mandrake Press. On the
following day I was reading Liber LXV. On Saturday the 24th I wrote: ‘asana. I
feel I am on a magickal awakening. I am retracing my shoddy steps and
furnishing myself with due knowledge’; it then continues: ‘asana: left leg
under right, right leg crossed over; right hand on right knee, left hand on
left foot. Began at 3.10 a.m. and ended at 3.45 a.m. I endured the pain; I
could have gone on for longer but decided not to. Images came into my head
rapidly (a row of heads or face masks, 6 in total. The last one was green and
had cat-like large eyes).
From this day my recording of ‘asanas’ and ‘exercises’ are almost daily:
Sun 25th April. Asana: same position as 24th. 8.40-9.10. p.m. Pain begins
9.05 p.m.
Mon 26th April. Asana: position as before. 3.40-4.30 p.m. severe pain in
left foot at the end (and right knee).
Tue 27th April. Asana: position as before. 2.00-2.40 p.m. After 30 minutes
pain begins.
On Wednesday 28th of April 1993 I had a Magickal breakthrough: I discovered
a certain aspect to the meaning of ASNIA at 4.20. p.m.:
AIN S A S NIA
soph aur soph
S A BAF (IAO)
60 1 216=70
LVX
Kether.
NOT- (nothingness. Void)………...O
Ain Soph- (no limit)………………………OO
Ain Soph Aur- (the limitless light)……………………………………………..OOO
On Friday 30th of April a new force came into existence the likes of which I cannot record here. I did my asana (left leg under anus, right leg bent with raised knee: this is my position and I shall refer to it as the position of Pan) from 2-3. p.m.
Tue 4th of May. Asana: Pan. 3.55-4.45 p.m. Pranayama: in 10, out 20. (Not
eaten). Pain intense after 35 minutes in right hip and right knee; pain in left
foot was unbearable.
Wed 5th of May. Asana: Pan. 3.55-4.25 p.m. Reading 777. Gemutriah.
Fri 7th of May. Asana: Pan. 12.45-1.25 p.m. Stomach empty. The next day I am
studying Ceremonial Magick.
Sun 9th of May. Asana: Pan. 9.20-10.15 a.m. The last 10 minutes were
excruciating; I could not do one hour! Began sweating profusely at 10.10
Mon 10th of May. Asana: Pan. 2.00- 2.55 a.m. Weather: thunder. Became
cramped at 02.30 and in agony by 02.45. Sweating, breathing became uneven; I
felt on the borderline of consciousness; pain in left foot, right knee, right
thigh and right buttock; slight pain in right foot.
Tue 11th of May. Asana: Pan. 2-2.30. pm. Interrupted!
Wed 12th of May. Asana: Pan. 1.55-2.55 a.m. Pain after 30 minutes. Last 10
minutes very painful.
Thur 13th of May. I was granted proof of my Magick after LBR and LVX Rituals
physically performed.
Fri 14th of May. Asana: Pan. 1.55-2.45. a.m. Interrupted, thus did not
complete one hour.
Sat 15th of May. Reading Magick, Appendix II.
Tue 18th of May. Asana: Pan. 2-2.35 a.m.
Fri 21st of May. Asana: Pan. 2-2.45 a.m. Pain in left heel.
Sat 22nd of May. ‘The struggle is nearly over; just time to slay old dragons
and have the courage to follow this chosen path!’ this is a reference to the
struggle between conflicting ideas within my ego; the old demons of the past
which re-occur and do not allow me to move forwards. These are to be ‘slayed’.
Wed 26th of May. Asana: Pan. 7.10-7.40 pm. Feeling unwell, conjunctivitis,
tired.
Fri 28th of May. Asana: Pan. 2-3 a.m. Still unwell. Conjunctivitis.
Mon 14th of June. Items were found on the floor and the kettle boiled dry
and no explanation at 8 am. On the night of Saturday 12th I created an ‘energy
mass’ using the solar plexus and I hope this is not the cause of the
disturbance. If so I will have to re-absorb it. I have not done Magickal work
recently as I have sworn an oath not to until a certain matter is fulfilled. I
later re-absorbed the energy.
Sat 19th of June. I intend to incorporate the R.C. (Rosy Cross) Ritual (17)
into my work and possibly prepare for Neophyte Ritual.
Tue 6th of July. Asana. 11.25-11.43 a.m. Chakras.
Fri 9th of July. Received Crowley’s ‘Rites of Eleusis’. On the following day
I wrote out some rituals: R.C. Ritual. Star Ruby Ritual. Read Rite of Jupiter.
Sat 10th of July. Read Rite of Mars and Rite of Sol.
Mon 12th of July. Asana: Legs crossed. 2-3 p.m. Pain in right foot at 2.45.
Read Rites of Venus, Mercury and Luna. The following day was spent learning the
Star Ruby Ritual and reading M.R. James.
On Monday 26th and Tuesday 27th. I performed the Star Ruby Ritual and later
in my asana: Pan, I did an exercise which used Pingala (18) and the mantra:
A.M.P.H. This lasted 15 minutes. I then did the Middle Pillar exercise (19) and
the Star Ruby Ritual.
Wed 4th of Aug. Invocation at 1.30 pm. I used the Water pentagram and the
Water symbol. It rained at 3 pm and I banish it at 10 pm. [perhaps evidence of
insanity afterall! Editor]
Wed 11th of Aug. Intended to attempt 30th Aethyr but decided against it
until tomorrow.
Thur 12th, Feast day. Performed the Lesser Banishing Ritual at 7.15 a.m. and
repeated the 19th call: TEX, vibrating the names of the Governors (20). It went
very well and ended at 11.10 a.m. where I performed the LBR (banishing).
Mon 16th, preparation for the 29th Aethyr: RII.
Wed 18th, water pentagram established at 2.10 p.m. The rains came down at
5.55 p.m.
Tue 24th, the complete volumes of ‘The Equinox’ arrived from Mandrake Press
(they were left on the doorstep as if they were something unimportant!) I began
reading Equinox volume III, number 1. Asana: legs crossed, stomach raised,
hands clenched. LBR, breathing steady. I used the words ‘Love is the Law, Love
under Will’ written on a large white page and as I read downwards the letters
increased in size. I experienced a whirling sensation and spasms or ‘stomach
jumps’; I definitely felt on the brink of something. I will try again tomorrow
night.
Wed 25th, water pentagram. Liber Cordis Cincti Serpente & Master of the
Temple to section V. Asana: lying flat on back. Breathing: in 9, hold 4, out 9,
hold 4. Managed ten minutes of this!
Thur 26th, completed Master of the Temple.
Fri 27th of Aug 1993. 29th Aethyr (21). After the LBR I made the call at
8.45 a.m. At 9.15 a.m. In my asana: legs crossed, hands gripped together with
the first fingers pointing upwards. Mantra: A.M.P.H. 9.15-10.09 a.m. Breathing
cycle: in 9, hold 4, out 9, hold 4. Some minor breaks. Chakras, Kundalini. Lost
time… my hands felt as if they were rising towards my face (body in suspension
sensation). I saw the white head and shoulders of a hairless man, turn to face
me. I make the appropriate pentagram to him and everything became illuminated
by white light (LVX). A black veil opened (22) and I saw ‘plumes of heat’ like
particles from the sun, boiling spumes etc. Then I saw a corner of a white room
with a white door with glass panels. There were white ‘amoebic’ shapes. I had a
‘break’ of a flower opening, not actual but suggested, very quickly in the
brain. I could look around and have use of my senses with complete control; I could
think, speak and move at will. The duration of the exercise lasted 56 minutes
(NU=56: NUIT). Lege Libellum (Light) from The Equinox.
Sat 28th, Crowley’s ‘Last Ritual’ from Mandrake Press arrived. Lege Libellum
(Light) & Khabs am Pekht.
Wed 1st of September, The Equinox: Seven Portals. Asana: Pan 9.50-10.30 p.m.
Pain in left leg became unbearable. I was ‘lured into the falsities of pain!’
Actual pain took hold 30 minutes into the practice = total 40 minutes. I plan
to deprive myself from the sense of hearing and use the 4 fold breath. This
morning I dreamt that my uncle H---- was shaking my hand; I took it to mean
that he would die soon. [In fact it would appear that his wife, my aunt L---
would die and he would soon follow]
Sat 4th, asana: Dragon. 12.55 p.m. Breath in (stomach out) breath out
(stomach in) - 1.00. 5 minutes duration. It became easy to keep the rhythm; not
my usual asana though I do like the Dragon posture as it keeps the spine rigid.
Breathing was quite rapid and I felt on the threshold of unconsciousness, but
that was not the point of the exercise, which was: to concentrate the mind on 2
aspects of breathing in a given duration (5 minutes) of rapid inhalation and
exhalation, with the concentration set on the rise and fall of the chest cavity.
Asana: legs crossed 12.10 a.m. (Sun 5th) -1 a.m.
Wed 8th, Golden Dawn Knowledge Lectures and Tarot.
Sun 12th, strange Magickal occurrences are happening almost daily.
Mon 13th. Asana: Pan. 4-4.30 p.m. I felt a burning sensation in my left hand
and right leg after 15 minutes. Not painful, more a pleasant glow as if I had
walked twenty miles. The pain came at the end of the practice, mostly right leg
at the knee and top of thigh. I also felt very sleepy; I could have done more
but I stated I would do 30 minutes and 30 minutes I did! Also stomach empty.
Wed 15th, LBR. Astral journey.
Sat 18th, reading 777 tables.
Tue 21st, Performed a secret rite which I later carried out in its initial
stage.
Wed 22nd, Performed the second part of the Rite.
Sat 25th, asana: Pan. 8.10-8.58 a.m. Duration= 48 minutes. Pain at 8.45
which became severe and I felt a sort of thunderous charge travel through my
body in bursts. I intended to do an hour but it was too painful and I was also
disturbed. Pain in right knee and hip, left foot numb.
Sun 26th, asana: legs crossed and arms folded on chest. 2.35 a.m. LBR.
Breathing smooth for count of 8 and imagined my body in front of me, robed in
scarlet and carrying the wand. I transferred to it and looked at my earth body.
I rose into the air with my feet together and arms at my sides. The right hand
holds the wand. I said ‘take me earthwards!’ and I re-entered my body.
Tue 28th, past life regression attempts.
Sat 2nd of October. Asana: dragon. 12.15-12.25 p.m. (12.15-12.20 right
thumb, right nostril; 12.20-12.25 left thumb, left nostril). Toes bent inwards.
Pain and gentle sweating. I performed the asana on a small one-and-a-half to
two-foot table. I thought: I am looking into from outside! But I was inside
looking out (facing the window). Pain in feet at end 12.25. The Law is for All:
Comments. Asana: Reversed Pan. 9.05-10.15 p.m. I didn’t really notice I was
doing asana until 40 minutes had passed by; I had just naturally slipped into
it unaware. Extreme pain when I unfolded myself. Duration: 1 hour, 10 minutes.
Mon 4th, preparing for the 28th Aethyr, also plans for the Neophyte Ritual:
‘I seek Initiation!’
Tue 5th, ‘Do what thou wilt…’ are the first words that issue from my mouth
upon waking; the first vocal vibration as an act of prayer. ‘Love is the law…’
are the last words spoken before sleep. This I do daily.
Wed 6th, reading The Equinox III, Master of the Temple. Asana: Pan.
9.04-9.55 p.m. Duration: 51 minutes. Rhythmic breathing: (‘breath-in,
breath-out). Pain start at 9.45. If I were alone in the room the pain would
have made me shout out! I was on the threshold of sweating. At the end there
was pain in the right leg, thigh and ankle. I took 5 minutes to rest the legs
before I could walk. Those 5 minutes between 9.50 and 9.55 seemed to take
forever but the pain was almost enjoyable at 9.45! Once more: ‘I seek
Initiation!’
Sat 9th. Book of Lies. Asana: Pan. 7.05-8.05 p.m. The pain began at 7.45 and
the minutes 8-8.05 were terrifying! Pain in right ankle, knee and thigh.
Sun 10th. 3 a.m. I felt as if I were the last man on earth. I felt on the
threshold of something as I sat in bed, yet I knew not what! Mantra: A.M.P.H.
after LBR. Began mantra at 3 a.m. and my mouth was quite watery; after 15
minutes my mouth was as dry as the desert. I did not count the breaks: fool
that I am! I felt that I was a table in a room, where the surface was my mind,
smooth and ready to accept ornamentation: fruit bowl, flowers etc. I must keep
a more detailed record of breaks!
3.48 p.m. I feel for the first time in my life that I am all microcosm in
the macrocosm (23). Solitude… matter and motion… Though I must judge falsities
for truth, this and the previous exercises of Sat 9th and Sun 10th have only
strengthened my vigilance and courage in the fight for existence. Thelema shall
rise above Love! The H.G.A. (Holy Guardian Angel) (24) spoke so much of, ‘shall
be conversed’ and ‘ye shall know NOT’.
Asana: Legs crossed. 8-8.30 p.m. and later at 9.05-9.55 (same asana). Pain
after 30 minutes.
Mon 11th October. Mantra: A.M.P.H. 2.35-2.45 a.m. (5 breaks).
Wed 13th October. After the LBR. Mantra: A.M.P.H. 2.45 a.m. Chakras.
Rhythmic breathing. LIGHT-LVX-DHYANA (25), I cannot tell if I am breathing in
or out, it felt like one huge inhalation or exhalation; I also felt pressure on
my chest. I felt dry and hot with a sensation of floating which lasted longer
than I’d experienced it before. ‘I have gone beyond that which I could not
penetrate. Raining and windy outside; I heard the window tap which increased
and focused the DHARANA (26). My mind seemed elevated to a higher
consciousness; the breath seemed cold on inhalation: like ‘life’ awakening the
‘death’ in ‘resurrection’; or electricity! My stomach was empty; my being felt
as if it were in a tumbling void, formless and timeless; my skin could have
been any shape or shapeless, there were no boundaries to conform to as in the
physical structure. I felt that I could have gone on much further with this,
but the practice ended. When I began I noticed there was a strong illumination
(my eyes were closed) which I have experienced a few times, a white light which
floods the brain and senses as if drowning in it and penetrated by it; like a
beam in the night sky. During asana my body was rigid in a straight, lying
position. A lot has happened since Sat 9th October e.v. [era vulgari: the
common era] I sought Initiation – I was granted Initiation!
Sat 16th October. Songs of the Spirit. Asana: Pan. 8-8.40 p.m. The pain
began earlier than usual at 8.25; quite severe in the right leg.
Sun 17th October. LBR. Chakras. 2.40 a.m. Weather: very cold outside and
cold in the Temple. Mantra: A.M.P.H. I had the sensation that my head was high
in the clouds and my body was separate from it on the ground, but still
connected; it was a struggle to think of my body and to contemplate it
belonging to me, likewise, it was difficult to think of my head as part of my
body. It was as if my head were a balloon on a string, or a kite soaring far from
me.
Tue 19th October. After LBR, chakras and mantra: A.M.P.H. 2.10-2.20 a.m.
Wed 20th October. After LBR, chakras. 2.10-2.20 a.m. Failed to get results.
Sun 24th October. 3.20 a.m. I lost all consciousness of myself; I was awake
yet I knew not who I was or where I was; I had lost the means of existence and
the grip on reality which holds us in the present. I was nothingness in a void!
Wed 27th October. 4 or 5 a.m. I looked into a mirror and saw my astral body.
I was on a warehouse roof and there were French girls dressed as waitresses; I
was at the window ledge when a voice said: ‘Do you want to wake up?’ The
question was repeated and I heard a loud scream in my left ear which woke me
up. I was sweating, my eyes were open. I felt exhausted as if I had been in a
great struggle; in fact, I struggled with madness this night: I did not win,
but I did not lose either! There was difficulty in opening my eyes, which took
some time. I really believed that a ‘madness’ was upon me! At the window, my
astral body was near to me, but the voice in my left ear: could it have been
some disembodied entity? Or perhaps my H.G.A. And was it the same ‘presence’
that helped me to escape the vision as the one who forced me into it? All I
know is there was genuine fear of the unknown at the mirror which I endured,
but I never answered ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to the question ‘Do you want to wake up?’,
it was a conscious decision made on my part by an external force: I feared for
my sanity. I had not planned to go to this place yet I was abducted from sleep!
Before this happened I was having difficulty sleeping so I tried to relax my
mind and let random images flow into it, but I kept hearing music and my eyes
naturally rose up into my head. I made a conscious effort to stop them doing so
which created a sort of rocking motion in my head. Also the voice came to the
left ear which was exposed as I was lying on my right side.
Sun 31st October. Halloween. Asana: Lotus position (I have been trying this
position for short periods) 9.25-9.35 p.m. I was situated in my brother’s room
(the haunted room) in the dark listening to Danse Macabre, Night on the Bare
Mountain and Sorcerer’s Apprentice. I did not feel alone at all. Ended at 9.45
p.m.
Mon 1st November. Asana: Pan. 11.05-11.40 a.m. Painful after 15 minutes and
I literally became ecstatic with pain!
Tue 2nd November. LBR. 2.25 a.m. Mantra: A.M.P.H. No effect too tired.
Asana: Pan. 8.35-9.05 p.m. I intended to do one hour but I was disturbed.
Magick: Bloody sacrifice!
Sun 7th November. Asana: Pan. 3.05-3.40 p.m.
Wed 10th November. LBR. Mantra: A.M.P.H. 2.30 a.m. Crowley’s shaven head.
Rushing down a dark tube; colour appear to be earthy reds and browns. I entered
a landscape; crowds of people were staring at me (but I go onwards), buildings
appeared. A new mantra takes my mind: ‘I must endure, even till nought!’ There
was an expanding sensation as my body became more and more shell-like. All
ended in mist.
6 p.m. Phenomena has been noticed in the house again! Someone keeps opening
(or closing) the letter box. There is some metal wire attached to it so it
could be fastened shut to prevent unwanted things being pushed through etc but
still it is sometimes open and sometimes closed! There is also the sound of a
door opening sometime in the early hours upstairs and it has been heard by
several people in the house.
Sun 14th November. Much of my diary has been ‘foolishly on my part’ censored
and so lines and even pages are erased and are illegible; magickal and sexual
references are blanked out. At 2.45 a.m. something of a magickal nature
occurred. Later I was awoken by a very strong wind blowing through my window; I
felt as if a presence was attempting to wake me. I had difficulty breathing as
if something was restricting me.
Fri 19th November. My aunt L---- has been in the last stages of life for
some time now. During the night the clock stopped and two hours elapsed before
the clock started by itself again. The following day my aunt L---- died at 2
p.m. (as it was revealed to me in vision!)
Sat 20th November. 3.25 a.m. LBR. Chakras. Mantra: A.M.P.H. Tatwa: Blue
Disc. I gave up after a few minutes.
Sun 28th November. Asana: Pan. 7-7.45 p.m. Not too painful.
Mon 29th November. An Invocation using Water Pentagram at 4 p.m. It rained
at 7 p.m. I banished it at 9.30 p.m. it stopped soon after.
Thur 2nd December. LBR. Chakras in morning. Body rigid, breathing rhythmic.
I drifted off to sleep with my mantra: ‘Perdurabo’ (27) rippling on my lips. I
was upside down and inside out. It became easy to induce euphoria using my eyes
and falsely telling my brain that I was in a state of euphoria. It lasted about
10 minutes, but what is time?
Sat 4th December. At 3.20 p.m. I performed a secret rite!
Tue 7th December. 3.20 a.m. LBR. Chakras, good success. Mantra: A.M.P.H.,
breathe slow and rapid but too tired to make anything of importance. Asana:
8.30-9.10 p.m.
Sat 11th December. 3.40 a.m. LBR. Mantra: A.M.P.H. I became almost unaware
of speaking and my lips seemed to be rippling. I concentrated on the mantra and
visualise it as a huge wheel turning, with the mantra whirling upon it. A
pyramid came to me, in a desert, under the night sky. I looked down upon it
from a 45 degree angle. Also a human face came to me and filled my very being;
it was a while before I noticed him staring at me and I startled as I saw his
piercing eyes (he was an elderly gentleman); every wrinkle upon his face
shouted ‘evil’. It is as if he passed through me, but lingered for a while to
see who was looking in on his world. LBR Banish as normal (I find I am able to
perform it in my sleep, before I wake).
Golden Dawn Lectures and Middle Pillar Exercise 7.50-9.25 p.m. Asana: Pan.
7.50-8.50 p.m. Pain began at 8.40, sweating and body felt tense. Middle Pillar
Exercise.
Sun 12th December. 3.15 a.m. LBR. Rose Cross and Middle Pillar Exercise. I
feel Regardie is correct when he says the Middle Pillar Exercise alone can
stimulate LVX.
Tue 21st December. Winter Solstice 8.26 p.m. At 4 a.m. this morning my
brother was alarmed at noises within his room again and seeing the white
flashes!
Love is the Law, love under will.
Notes:
1. Asana – a position assumed by the body for the practice of yoga. There
are eight branches within Yoga: a) Yama (control), b) Niyama (super control),
c) Asana (posture control), d) Pranayama (breath control), e) Pratyahara
(introspection/analysis), f) Dharana (concentration on one), g) Dhyana (first
trance state), h) Samadhi (final trance state; union with God, the Universe).
See Magick, part I and Liber O vel Manus et Sagittae, sub figura vi, The
Equinox II, p 11. Also Liber E vel Exercitiorum, The Equinox I, p 25. Also The
Wake World in Konx Om Pax, p 1.
2. Pranayama – prana (Sanskrit) ‘life force’ [breath] and ayama (Sanskrit)
‘control’. See Magick, part I. Also Liber CCVI Liber Ru vel Spiritus, The
Equinox VII, p 59.
3. Tatwa: There are five Tatwas, each representing an element – Prithivi
(yellow square), element: earth, Sephira: Malkuth; Vayu (blue circle), element:
air, Sephira: Yesod; Apas (silver crescent), element: water, Sephira: Hod;
Tejas (red triangle), element: fire, Sephira: Netzach; Akasha (black/indigo
egg/ovoid), element: ether/spirit, Sephira:Tiphareth. They are used
specifically for elemental astral visionary purposes.
4. Aethyr of air. See Tatwa.
5. Sylph – an elemental being that inhabits the element of Air.
6. Asnia: A magical word whose number is 122, specific to the probationer.
7. Kundalini: the ‘coiled’ serpent at the base of the spine; an energy force
[shakti] relative to the sexual organs. The Kundalini serpent is ‘awakened’ and
rises up through the chakras to the crown of the head (Sahasrara chakra).
8. Book of the Law: Liber Al vel Legis. For a full account of this see
Aleister Crowley’s ‘The Equinox of the Gods’.
9. Abramelin: an elaborate operation in which the magician, through daily
ritual and intense invocations, discovers his or her Holy Guardian Angel. It is
the most important aspect of the Great Work. Crowley purchased Boleskine House
on the banks of Loch Ness, Scotland, solely for the purpose of performing this
dangerous operation. See ‘The Confessions of Aleister Crowley’ and ‘The Sacred
Magic of Abramelin the Mage’ by S. L. Mathers.
10. Chakras: the seven centres of psychic energy in line with the spine,
beginning with the muladhara at the base of the spine; the svadisthana or
sacral chakra; the manipura or solar plexus; the anahata or heart chakra; the
vishudda or throat chakra; the ajna or third eye (pineal gland), and the
sahasrara or crown chakra.
11. Mudra: a symbolic ritual gesture usually performed by the hands or
fingers.
12. Mantra: A.M.P.H. [Aum Mani Padme Hum]. See Magick, part I.
13. Four-fold breath: A technique used to relax and control the mind
previous to magical work. Inhale to a count of 4; hold for a count of 4; exhale
for a count of 4 and hold for a count of 4 – (4/4/4/4/).
14. LBR pent: the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram. See Magick,
appendix vii: Liber O vel Manus Et Sagittae sub figura vi.
15. Gestures. See Magick, part III – ‘Of The Gestures’.
16. Abrahadabra: the Word of the Aeon that signifies the Great Work is
accomplished. It is the uniting of the Pentagram (5) and the Hexagram (6); the
Microcosm and the Macrocosm, and therefore it is a magical formula whose number
is 418. Note there are five letter A’s and six consonants which equals eleven
letters: eleven is the number of Magick.
17. R.C. ritual: the Ritual of the Rosy Cross. A ceremony taught in the
Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn, which like the Lesser Banishing Rituals of
the Pentagram and the Hexagram, cleanses the space in which the magician works
and enables the mind to focus on the work.
18. Pingala (sun): one of the nadis which runs alongside the sushumna. Its
opposite nadi is the Ida (moon).
19. Middle Pillar exercise: a technique developed in the Golden Dawn and
later expanded upon by Israel Regardie. See ‘The Complete Golden Dawn System of
Magic’ by Regardie and his ‘Middle Pillar’.
20. 19th call aethyr enochian. See Liber LXXXIV – Vel Chanokh. The Equinox
VII, p 229 and VIII p 99. Also see Liber CCCCXVIII The Vision and the Voice –
Aerum vel Saeculi, The Equinox V, special supplement.
21. 29th aethyr. See Liber LXXXIV – Vel Chanokh. The Equinox VII, p 229 and
VIII p 99. Also see Liber CCCCXVIII The Vision and the Voice – Aerum vel Saeculi,
The Equinox V, special supplement.
22. LVX: Latin (Lux)= Light. See The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the
Hexagram. Paroketh: The Veil of Illusion, a symbolic portal separating
Tiphareth from the lower half of the Tree of Life.
23. Microcosm, Macrocosm: Man and God; earth and the Heavens. The Pentagram
and the Hexagram etc.
24. HGA: Holy Guardian Angel. See Liber LXV Liber Cordis Cincti Serpente,
The Equinox XI (vol III) part 1.
25. Dhyana. ‘Is the holding the mind on to some particular object. An unbroken
flow of knowledge in that subject is Dhyana. When that, giving up all forms,
reflects only the meaning, it is samadhi’. [Magick p 30] See Magick, part I.
26. Dharana. See Magick, part I.
27. Perdurabo (Latin) ‘I will endure to the end!’ Aleister Crowley’s magical
motto in the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn.
THE MAGIC BOOK WORM
REVIEWS BY BARRY VAN-ASTEN
Magick In Theory And Practice - by Aleister Crowley.
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.
This is Crowley's magnum opus and an essential book for any enthusiast of the occult arts or student of Crowley's system of Magick. It comprises of three sections:
Part I - Mysticism (yoga techniques) the basis for all magical work.
Part II - Ceremonial Magic with a complete description of the magical weapons and their uses as taught in the Golden Dawn.
Part III - Crowley's magical system in theory and practice expounded with its foundations rooted in the Book of the Law and the aeon of Horus. There are certain formulas with their significance to the Great Work and chapters on Consecrations, Oaths, Invocations, Clairvoyance, Divination, Alchemy and rituals taken from The Equinox.
Some of the ideology can be obscure to the beginner but through diligent research and understanding many of its tenets become clearer to the student. I would suggest that it is read alongside The Great Beast by John Symonds and The Magical Records of the Beast 666 by Symonds & Grant. The Book of the Law is also advised for the most part of the book, especially part III, and what burgeoning library of the student would be complete without The Confessions of Aleister Crowley?
It is the handbook that all modern day magicians should own. I personally obtained the book in my early teens and the book seemed to grow in strength with a magical energy of its own - it became a living tool and a compendium of great knowledge and wisdom. It is therefore an excellent place for those with an open and enquiring mind wishing to unravel and understand the great driving force and life's work of the man they dubbed 'the wickedest man in the world' - Aleister Crowley!
Love is the law, love under will.
Gems From The Equinox - by Israel Regardie.
This is an excellent compendium of the major works found in Crowley's great masterpiece of occult knowledge - The Equinox, a periodical which declared the Law of the New Aeon of Thelema. Gems from the Equinox is divided into seven sections on themes such as: The Book of the Law, Yoga, Magick, and Sex Magick etc and there is something for all students and scholars of Magick and Crowley's works in this concise collection. Israel Regardie has done a fine job on this volume of illumination, yet how can it ever compare to that superior star which is the Equinox?
There are some omissions which I feel should have been included, such as: The Temple of Solomon the King, John St John, Across the Gulf, The Rites of Eleusis, The Herb Dangerous, and The Soldier! and the Hunchback?... - yes, these are available elsewhere and space is always a factor, yet to have them all in one volume would be a wonder indeed!
But we must forgive Mr Regardie for reducing the greatest periodical ever written in the English language concerning magical instruction, into a mere work of art and beauty in one extraordinary volume, of which, I'm sure Crowley would have approved (despite the omissions)!
The Collected Works Of Aleister Crowley - by Aleister Crowley.
The Collected Works of Aleister Crowley (three volumes) is just a small fragment of his massive, prolific output. In volume one we see the young 'beast', already enjoying the assembled air of aristocracy and demonic debauchery, in his rooms at Trinity College, Cambridge, immersed in science and philosophy. The poems are chiefly spiritual and mystical and they show the lyrical and dramatic influences of Baudelaire, Swinburne, Shelley and Byron. We see a man bored by the constraints of Edwardian England, seeking new horizons and new sins. Poems such as 'Aceldama', 'The Tale of Archaise', 'Songs of the Spirit', 'Jephthah' and 'Tanhauser' give us a glimpse into the mind of the great man and his vast knowledge. Volume two continues with 'Alice: An Adultery' and 'The Sword of Song', while volume three concludes with 'Why Jesus Wept', Rosa Mundi, and other love songs', 'Rodin in Rime' and 'Orpheus'. We find Crowley the 'romantic' and Crowley the 'wanderer', yet 'White Stains' (1898) and 'Snowdrops from a Curate's Garden' (1908) are curiously not included! Crowley proves himself a highly technical poet with a mastery of the English language, yet some say his poems are mere exercises in which to display his wealth of learning and that amongst the deep ocean of his verse are only a handful of sunken treasures. This is probably true for the casual reader, afterall, who takes the time and trouble to read Tennyson anymore! But for those willing to look beyond the mountain of lies written about Crowley and his reputation as the 'wickedest man in the world'; to discover a little more about this huge figure in occult history, then what better place to begin than where the soul is laid bare - his poetry!
The Magical Record Of The Beast 666 - by John Symonds and Kenneth Grant.
The Magical Record of the Beast 666 by John Symonds and Kenneth Grant gives us a fascinating glimpse into the magical activities of Aleister Crowley during the years of the Great War. They can be read as a continuation of the experiments he made with fellow magician and poet Victor Neuburg, during 1914 in The Paris Working - a series of homosexual 'operations' which were a transition between the ceremonial rituals as taught in the Golden Dawn and the sex rites of the Ordo Templi Orientis. The sexual force replaced the lengthy conjurations of the past and the records aim to show to what extent the sexual 'current' can determine or influence events. The 'Magical Records' comprises of 'Rex de Arte Regia' (The King on the Royal Art), a magical diary beginning in Sept 1914 - March 1915 and continuing Feb 1916 - Sept 1918. There is also 'The Magical Record of the Beast' from Dec 1919 - Dec 1920, followed by Liber Al vel Legis (The Book of the Law). This is an invaluable book to the collector of 'Crowleyana' and it documents an important period in the history of his life.
The Confessions Of Aleister Crowley - Edited by John Symonds and Kenneth Grant.
The Confessions of Aleister Crowley, written in the nineteen-twenties, mostly at the Abbey of Thelema, contain his fascinating exploits in magick, his travels and mountain climbing and his Great Revelation for Mankind - the Law of Thelema, as received in the Book of the Law, in Cairo, 1904. Crowley broke all the conventions of his day and explored the outer regions of mind and body through the use of sex, drugs, ceremonial magic and Eastern philosophy. He exhausted himself on adventure and although he often lived up to his reputation as the 'wickedest man in the world' he was sometimes capable of heroic gestures and he wrote some of the most sublime passages of poetry in the English language. I have read this book several times and it is always a delight. Written in six parts with easy to digest chapters the interest remains throughout the major events of Crowley's life - his encounter with the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn; the Sacred Magic of Abramelin the Mage; his meeting and friendship with Allan Bennett, his marriage to Rose Kelly; Liber Al vel Legis; the Kanchenjunga expedition; the Abbey of Thelema, and so on...
However he is remembered: magician, poet, mountaineer or chess master, this book will remain a witty and wise account of one of the greatest enigmatical figures in English history. Superb!
PEGAMINA
By BARRY VAN-ASTEN
PART ONE
PEGAMINA AND THE DANCING MERMAID
Pretty things were all she thought about, for they reminded her of her mother’s love. When she heard the birds singing, she heard her mother’s soft voice calling to her. When she smelt the pretty flowers growing in the meadow, she smelt the fresh morning fragrance of her mother. When she felt the warmth of the sun upon her face, she felt her mother’s kiss upon her cheek. And each morning as she buttoned up her dress, she would remember how her mother had once held four pearl-white buttons in her hand and said ‘now Pegamina, I will give you the sun and the stars and the world’ and she placed three of the buttons into Pegamina’s hand, saying ‘the fourth I shall keep for myself for it is the moon and one day, you shall have that too!’ And whenever Pegamina looked at the moon in the night sky, she would make a wish and cry for Pegamina missed her mother so much.
When she felt sad her father would say ‘your mother was so kind and gentle Peg that God wanted her to be an angel and although she is not here anymore, she will always be with us in our hearts’. But Pegamina did not understand why her mother could not be an angel and still be her mother.
Poor Pegamina, she was such an unhappy little girl and she found it so difficult to make friends, which made her feel so much alone. And so she lived in her own world of dreams where everything is beautiful and nothing can hurt you. But other children found her strange and called her cruel names until she would cry and want her mother to come and wrap her arms around her and say ‘mother will make it all better’, but she never came.
Sometimes she would sit in the garden, playing by herself and watching the small animals that crossed the lane into the field beyond, and she would whisper: ‘oh fox, I only want to be like other children’. But in her heart she knew that even the gentle creatures that she greeted, silently turned away from her, which hurt her just as much as the horrible names the other children would shout at her. But oh how Pegamina loved the animals.
Like most little girls she was very fond of horses, but Pegamina’s favourite animal in the whole world was the elephant. In fact, when she was small the only thing she would ever draw was elephants: baby elephants, dancing elephants and great tusked giant elephants. She even collected cuddly toy elephants and little elephant statues. But now, she could hardly look at an elephant without bursting into tears, for they reminded her of when her mother would take her into her arms when she felt sad and say ‘my little elephant, Peg?’ and she would begin to tell Pegamina her favourite story, always beginning with how she is a very special little girl, for you see ‘God made all the little animals and when he had finished he sat back and looked upon his creations with great pride. But there was one little elephant in the kingdom who wept day and night for he was such an unhappy elephant; he would go into the forest alone and look at his reflection in the river as the tears rolled down his face, falling into the water. And when God saw this he took pity on the sad little elephant and asked him why he was so sad, and the elephant replied:
‘You have given the nightingale its beautiful song; you have given the tiger its mighty roar; you have given the rhino its distinguishing horn, but what have I? You have given the stag its proud antlers and the leopard its spots and you have given the peacock its handsome tail, but what have I?’ And God looked upon the little elephant and said:
‘It is true that I have given each animal its special gift, and so to you will I give something special, for you see, I cannot have sadness in my kingdom’. And after a moment’s thought, the gift was given. But the little elephant felt no different and said so.
‘Look into the water!’ said God. And the elephant looked, and he saw, waving in front of his face, a huge trunk that he dipped into the water, as tears of happiness ran down it. And the sad little elephant was never sad again.
Pegamina never tired of hearing the story and would prompt her mother if she forgot the slightest detail, or ask for parts of it to be repeated, for she so loved the sound of her mother’s comforting voice. And after the story had been told, she always liked to wonder what it would be like being that little elephant, looking at the sky through its eyes and drinking from the river with its trunk, spraying the water into the air.
On other occasions her mother would sing to her. Most of all Pegamina liked the song about the scarecrow who wanted to see everything in the world, but because he had no legs, he couldn’t even move so much as a step, and so he had to dream what the world is like:
‘My back is an old wooden pole,
My chest is a bundle of straw;
Here I stand between pastures that roll,
Yet my dreams show me so much more...
I want to see how children play
But my eyes are black and worn.
I want to rise from this forest of hay
Where I fight with my days in the corn!
I want to see rivers that endlessly flow
Towards some distant shore;
I want to be free for I have to know
Why crows don’t scare, no more!
I want to see flowers and blossoms and blooms
And smell more than harvested hay;
To talk about art in elegant rooms
And not stumble with which words to say!
I want to see so much more than I do,
Where nature’s dreams collide...
To trample my limbs in the luminous dew
Where angel eyes have cried!
My back is an old wooden pole,
My chest is a bundle of straw;
No heart in my breast nor no soul
Can give me these things I wish for!’
But most of all Pegamina liked to hear the story about the broken-hearted mermaid who had only one desire in life and that was to dance like a ballerina. But how can a mermaid dance when there is a tail where legs should be?
One moonlit night, as the mermaid sat singing some sad and beautiful tune beside a rock, the wind began to blow around her and through her long golden hair as it whispered into her small sea-shell-like ear: ‘why are you singing such a sad song when you are so beautiful that even the moon is envious of your beauty?’ And the mermaid replied: ‘I am sad, for I am tired of the sea and all it contains, my only true desire is to dance and be a ballerina, admire by all who come and see me’. And the wind said ‘beautiful mermaid, you are what you are, can’t you be happy with that?’ And the tearful mermaid replied, ‘I have tried all my life to be content with the sea, but I don’t like who I am or what I have become!’ ‘Then I shall give you all that you desire!’ the wind said, ‘but you must promise never to return to the sea, for I would not see your beauty altered, and in granting your wish, a star must die! Tell me, do you still wish?’
‘I wish!’ said the mermaid. And the air grew still and the sea grew calm as she trembled and swam slowly towards the shore. And then, from the foam she rose on the most beautiful legs you could ever imagine and all she could do was admire them in the moonlight. Then suddenly, she took a step, and then another, until eventually she was twirling, first this way, then that way, upon her toes. And then she stood upon one leg with her arms in the air, bringing her perfectly arched leg down to rest beside the other, as she made the most beautiful movements across the sand; more beautiful than the waves had ever been, or the dolphins under the sea. And she danced until she was gone, far from the sea and happier than she had ever been before, and only a little sad for the death of a star. And Pegamina would often think about the mermaid and wonder if she would ever stop dancing.
The Dancing Mermaid
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